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	<title type="text">Eleanor Barkhorn | Vox</title>
	<subtitle type="text">Our world has too much noise and too little context. Vox helps you understand what matters.</subtitle>

	<updated>2024-03-08T12:40:24+00:00</updated>

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				<name>Constance Grady</name>
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				<name>Aja Romano</name>
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			<author>
				<name>Alissa Wilkinson</name>
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				<name>Eleanor Barkhorn</name>
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			<title type="html"><![CDATA[The complicated case of A Star Is Born and its Best Picture dreams]]></title>
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			<updated>2024-03-08T07:40:24-05:00</updated>
			<published>2019-02-22T13:10:00-05:00</published>
			<category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Awards Shows" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Culture" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Movies" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Oscars" />
							<summary type="html"><![CDATA[Each year, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences nominates between five and 10 movies to compete for the&#160;Oscars&#8217; Best Picture trophy &#8212; its most prestigious award, and the one given out at the very end of the ceremony. There&#8217;s no strict definition for what makes a &#8220;best&#8221; picture; it&#8217;s easiest to think about [&#8230;]]]></summary>
			
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<img alt="" data-caption="Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga star in A Star Is Born. | Warner Bros." data-portal-copyright="Warner Bros." data-has-syndication-rights="1" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/13221175/star4.jpg?quality=90&#038;strip=all&#038;crop=0,0,100,100" />
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	Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga star in A Star Is Born. | Warner Bros.	</figcaption>
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<p>Each year, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences nominates between five and 10 movies to compete for the&nbsp;<a href="https://www.vox.com/2018/12/12/18127861/oscars-2019-news-updates">Oscars</a>&rsquo; Best Picture trophy &mdash; its most prestigious award, and the one given out at the very end of the ceremony. There&rsquo;s no strict definition for what makes a &ldquo;best&rdquo; picture; it&rsquo;s easiest to think about it as an honor given to the film that Hollywood thinks best represents the year in movies.</p>

<p>So whichever film wins Best Picture essentially represents the American movie industry&rsquo;s view of its role in driving culture, as well as its capabilities and aspirations, at a specific point in time.</p>

<p>Every year&rsquo;s nominee slate, then, is a rough approximation of the options from which the industry will choose as it attempts to characterize its past 12 months. And one thing that&rsquo;s definitely true about&nbsp;<a href="https://www.vox.com/2019/1/22/18188209/oscars-2019-best-picture-nominees-streaming-favourite-roma-star-is-born-vice-black-panther">the eight Best Picture nominees</a>&nbsp;from 2018 is that they exhibit a <em>lot</em> of variety.</p>

<p>There&rsquo;s <a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/2/15/17008196/black-panther-review">a superhero film</a>, two political satires (one set in <a href="https://www.vox.com/2018/11/21/18069758/favourite-review-stone-colman-weisz">an 18th-century royal court</a> and one set <a href="https://www.vox.com/2018/12/21/18144605/vice-review-dick-cheney-adam-mckay-christian-bale-sam-rockwell-bush-steve-carell-rumsfeld">in the White House</a>), a movie <a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/5/15/17355432/blackkklansman-review-spike-lee-david-duke-charlottesville">about infiltrating the Ku Klux Klan</a>, a <a href="https://www.vox.com/2018/9/14/17835796/star-is-born-review-lady-gaga-bradley-cooper">classic Hollywood remake</a>, a <a href="https://www.vox.com/2018/11/16/18069756/green-book-review-racism-schomburg-segregation-golden-globes">classic Hollywood feel-good buddy comedy</a>, a <a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/11/2/18048688/bohemian-rhapsody-review-freddie-mercury-rami-malek-bryan-singer">rocker biopic</a>, and a <a href="https://www.vox.com/2018/11/20/18102734/roma-review-netflix-cuaron">sweeping domestic drama</a>. And thinking about what the Academy voters &mdash; as well as audiences and critics &mdash; found enticing about them can help us better understand both the state of Hollywood and, broadly speaking, what we were looking for at the movies this year.</p>

<p>In the runup to the Oscars on February 24, Vox&rsquo;s staff is discussing each of the eight Best Picture nominees in turn. What makes each film appealing to Academy voters? What makes it emblematic of the year? And should it win?</p>

<p>Here, we talk about <a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/10/8/17951780/star-is-born-lady-gaga-bradley-cooper-news-reviews"><em>A Star Is Born</em></a>, Bradley Cooper&rsquo;s directorial debut and the third (or fourth, depending on how you look at it) remake of <a href="https://www.vox.com/2018/10/4/17902424/star-is-born-versions-what-price-hollywood-streisand-cukor-garland-cooper-gaga">an archetypal Hollywood story</a>. Lady Gaga, Bradley Cooper, and Sam Elliott star, and all are nominated for acting Oscars for their performances.</p>

<p>Joining the conversation are Vox culture reporters Aja Romano, Constance Grady, and Alissa Wilkinson, and deputy managing editor Eleanor Barkhorn.</p>

<p>What is it about <em>A Star Is Born </em>that makes it so appealing to Hollywood?</p>

<p><strong>Alissa Wilkinson: </strong><em>A Star Is Born</em> is probably the most &ldquo;classic&rdquo; of the Best Picture nominees at the 2019 Oscars. It&rsquo;s got a lot going for it: box office success, big stars, a charming (if a bit generic) origin story in Bradley Cooper&rsquo;s directorial debut, a lot of catchy music (with <a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2019/2/10/18219830/lady-gaga-grammys-2019-watch-shallow-star-is-born">a Grammy-winning single in &ldquo;Shallow&rdquo;</a>), and a time-tested story that has been nominated for Best Picture every time it&rsquo;s been remade, though it&rsquo;s yet to win the big prize.</p>

<p>It&rsquo;s also a show business melodrama, and the Oscars love movies about show business.</p>

<p>Interestingly, the film premiered to festival raves and did well with audiences, but its Best Picture potential seems to have fizzled over the past few months. It was nominated for seven total Oscars, which is nothing to sneeze at. But Cooper didn&rsquo;t nab a Best Director nomination, even though he and the film&rsquo;s other two stars were all nominated in the acting categories, even though he&rsquo;s nominated for co-writing the film, and even though the movie is up for Best Picture. It&rsquo;s <a href="https://hiddenremote.com/2019/02/22/wrong-oscar-campaign-a-star-is-born/">no longer</a> <a href="https://www.latimes.com/entertainment/movies/la-et-mn-oscars-star-is-born-postmortem-20190221-story.html">the favorite</a> <a href="https://www.vulture.com/2019/02/oscars-2019-why-star-is-born-is-getting-snubbed.html">it was</a> earlier in the awards season, though.</p>

<p>So that brings me to my first question: Why do you think the film got nominated for Best Picture in the first place? What would it mean for it to win? And why do you think the buzz has cooled on it a bit?</p>

<p><strong>Constance Grady: </strong><em>A Star Is Born</em> went through a classic &ldquo;peaked too early&rdquo; scenario: It had tons of early festival buzz going for it, but it also had an early backlash &mdash; which meant that at the same time that audiences were hearing about how good it was, they were also hearing a lot of critiques. And while I enjoyed this movie, most of those critiques strike me as pretty reasonable.</p>

<p>I&rsquo;ve already written for Vox about <a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/10/19/17979048/a-star-is-born-rock-pop-controversy-debate">the film&rsquo;s confusing<strong> </strong>treatment of its rock versus pop binary</a>, and that confusion drove a lot of hot takes: People wrote extensively about how this movie was <a href="https://slate.com/culture/2018/10/a-star-is-born-rockism-bradley-cooper-lady-gaga-movie.html">too rockist and stuck in the past</a>, or about how <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/08/arts/music/lady-gaga-star-is-born-authenticity-pop.html">it wasted the poptimistic potential of Lady Gaga</a>.</p>

<p>The other big critique of this movie is that after a near-perfect first hour, <a href="https://www.forbes.com/sites/scottmendelson/2018/09/25/a-star-is-born-review-bradley-cooper-and-lady-gaga-are-caught-in-a-bad-romance/#37c63bea1e6d">it falls apart in the second half</a>. I think there&rsquo;s something to that. In the first half of the movie, it&rsquo;s astonishing to watch Cooper watch Gaga sing, to watch him fall in love with her as we in the audience fall in love with her through him. When Gaga takes the stage to sing &ldquo;Shallow,&rdquo; it&rsquo;s as perfect a cinematic moment as you could ask for.</p>

<p>But when everything starts to fall apart for Jackson and Ally in the second half, the movie starts to feel a little less assured, a little clumsier. It&rsquo;s turning sour and bitter. It can no longer summon the emotional purity that made its first half so striking, and it struggles to figure out a new tonal register to replace the old one.</p>

<p>All told, I think that first hour of <em>A Star Is Born</em> is why the movie is up for Best Picture, and I think the second hour is why the awards fervor has cooled on it considerably.</p>

<p>Do you think the film&rsquo;s first hour is good enough that Oscar voters should overlook what comes later? Or would you go against the tide and argue that the second hour of <em>A Star Is Born</em> is actually just as good as the first?</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Should <em>A Star Is Born</em> be this appealing in the first place?</h2>
<p><strong>Aja Romano: </strong><a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/10/11/17949016/a-star-is-born-gender-consent-criticism-sexism">I&rsquo;d actually argue</a> that neither the first hour nor the second hour of <em>A Star Is Born</em> is great, and we should all, perhaps, take a step back and rethink our continued valorization and canonization of this narrative that unfailingly seems to turn a woman&rsquo;s success into a man&rsquo;s tragedy. The titular star&rsquo;s path to success is always inextricable from her husband&rsquo;s decline, addiction, and inability to handle her success.</p>

<p>I agree that the success of this narrative largely depends on the inherent glamour of the first half, the fairy tale interaction and chemistry between the two leads and the charisma of its leading lady. But I also feel I watched a very different first half than everyone else did: one in which Gaga&rsquo;s character was constantly having her agency overridden by the men around her. Crucially, her &ldquo;perfect cinematic moment&rdquo; came because she was pressured into singing by a man who told her he was going to sing her song no matter what, with or without her, without her permission &mdash; a man who then inevitably berated her later on when she tried to assert more autonomy over her career.</p>
<img src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/13051107/star1.jpg?quality=90&#038;strip=all&#038;crop=0,0,100,100" alt="Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga in A Star Is Born." title="Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga in A Star Is Born." data-has-syndication-rights="1" data-caption="Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga in &lt;em&gt;A Star Is Born.&lt;/em&gt; | Warner Bros." data-portal-copyright="Warner Bros." />
<p>I&rsquo;ve been baffled that this really obvious critique of the film hasn&rsquo;t gotten more play, and I&rsquo;ll admit to feeling a little gaslit by the way fans of the narrative gloss over its sexism. I appreciated the complexity both Gaga and Cooper brought to their roles, and particularly the sensitivity with which Cooper overlaid his character&rsquo;s struggle with addiction with his struggle to prove his manhood to himself. But I feel somewhat exasperated that I have to keep pointing out that the &ldquo;sour and bitter&rdquo; tone that emerges in its second half, and the sense that it&rsquo;s stuck in the past, isn&rsquo;t a fault of <em>this</em> movie per se. Cooper&rsquo;s <em>A Star Is Born</em> is flawlessly made and acted, but these issues are embedded in the DNA of this narrative.</p>

<p>With the exception of the very first film in the <em>Star Is Born</em> line, the superb <em>What Price Hollywood?</em>, the &ldquo;star is born&rdquo; narrative contains the inherent assumption that the more the woman in the relationship asserts herself and carves out an independent career path for herself, the more her success will inevitably emasculate and humiliate her husband as he&rsquo;s deprived of his traditional role as breadwinner and patriarch of his household. That his inability to cope with her rising fame always goes hand in hand with his escalating struggles with addiction further complicates questions of equality, because the narrative is always predicated on the idea that if he could just overcome this tragic flaw, he would be an amazing and understanding partner.</p>

<p>But the narrative also never really acknowledges &mdash; the 1976 Streisand-Kristofferson version comes closest &mdash; that their relationship contains inherent power imbalances from the very beginning that all serve to benefit him rather than her, and that his psychological decline is largely due to his inability to stop seeing her as an extension of himself.</p>

<p>I want to say that the heel-cooling on this film prior to Oscar night is about voters seeing and critiquing these elements of the film with clear sight, rather than responding to the weak aspects of the film&rsquo;s back half alone. But I&rsquo;m not sure that&rsquo;s the case.</p>

<p>Am I being too hard on <em>A Star Is Born</em>? Should I just be kicking back and enjoying <a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/10/5/17931256/a-star-is-born-best-memes">all the memes</a>?</p>

<p><strong>Constance: </strong>I think you&rsquo;re right, Aja, that the gender roles baked into the <em>Star Is Born</em> story are &hellip; not great, to say the least. One of the oddest things to watch during Bradley Cooper&rsquo;s press tour for this movie has been <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2018/09/27/movies/bradley-cooper-a-star-is-born.html">his continued insistence</a> that in <em>this</em> version of <em>A Star Is Born</em>, unlike previous versions, the man is not jealous of the woman&rsquo;s success but rather protective of the purity of her soul and her music.</p>

<p>That&rsquo;s a baffling contention for multiple reasons, beginning with the fact that Jackson is <em>clearly</em> jealous of Ally (we all saw the scene where Ally racked up some professional success without him and then he smeared a bagel on her face and she said, &ldquo;You jealous fuck,&rdquo; right?), but also because the alternative narrative that Cooper is suggesting is really not that much better.</p>

<p>Cooper&rsquo;s narrative is the best-case scenario narrative, the most flattering possible interpretation you can give Jackson &mdash; and it still posits Jackson as the guardian of Ally&rsquo;s identity, the one who understands who she is and who she should be on a level that she herself never grasps. It suggests that Jackson should make all of Ally&rsquo;s choices for her because she can&rsquo;t be trusted to make them on her own. That&rsquo;s gross! It&rsquo;s not a good narrative!</p>

<p>And I agree with you, Aja, that all these problems are baked into the story from the beginning. But I do think it&rsquo;s important to not overlook the aesthetic and emotional drive of this movie. That is clear and focused in the first half of the film in a way that it&rsquo;s not in the second half, and I think it&rsquo;s because the heart of this movie is essentially rooted in the audience watching Bradley Cooper watch Lady Gaga perform. His gaze on her is what the movie is interested in &mdash; which, again: not great! &mdash; and once that gaze becomes less than awestruck, once he goes from crying as he watches her perform &ldquo;La Vie en Rose&rdquo; to wincing and slugging shots of whiskey as she performs &ldquo;Why Did You Do That&rdquo; &hellip; well, that&rsquo;s when the movie starts to lose its power.&nbsp;</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">The emotional power of <em>A Star Is Born</em></h2>
<p><strong>Eleanor Barkhorn: </strong>As the person on this roundtable who&rsquo;s most removed from the ins and outs of the Oscar race, it&rsquo;s interesting to hear the &ldquo;it was a frontrunner and now it&rsquo;s not&rdquo; narrative about <em>A Star Is Born</em>. I have no insight or expertise on the question of why the movie&rsquo;s prospects have dimmed over time. I&rsquo;m still pretty much in the mindset of those early festival viewers &mdash; I loved this movie. I really fell for it.</p>

<p>I actually found the first half of the movie a little hard to get into initially because I was tripped up by all the ways the details felt implausible to me. Specifically &mdash; don&rsquo;t you need training to learn how to sing in front of a huge crowd like the one Jackson drags Ally in front of that first time? And sure, the movie shows Ally becoming a YouTube sensation after one of her early performances with Jackson, but wouldn&rsquo;t she also be the subject of fascination on Twitter and in gossip mags &mdash; who is this nobody showing up on stage with Jackson Maine?!</p>
<img src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/9971713/star.jpg?quality=90&#038;strip=all&#038;crop=0,0,100,100" alt="Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga in A Star Is Born" title="Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga in A Star Is Born" data-has-syndication-rights="1" data-caption="Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga in &lt;em&gt;A Star Is Born&lt;/em&gt; | Warner Bros." data-portal-copyright="Warner Bros." />
<p>But when I let myself see the movie as a fairy tale, as something going for emotional realism rather than the showbiz-today literalism I was looking for at first, I relaxed and just enjoyed the spectacle.</p>

<p>And what spectacle! The songs are so good. &ldquo;Shallow,&rdquo; of course, but I also love the bittersweet sensuality of &ldquo;Always Remember Us This Way.&rdquo; Constance, I know you draw a line between the Gaga-forward songs and the ones that Bradley Cooper anchors, but I actually like a few of the Jackson songs. &ldquo;Maybe It&rsquo;s Time&rdquo; is a solid folky rock song and a good presentation of Jackson as a character. (&ldquo;Music to My Eyes,&rdquo; however, is just bad.) The Ally-Jackson chemistry is mesmerizing. And I always love intergenerational drama &mdash; I&rsquo;m a sucker for the &ldquo;Ally&rsquo;s dad was a singer who never made it&rdquo; backstory.</p>

<p>And maybe I&rsquo;m just justifying my enjoyment of the movie, but I am not fully convinced by some of the critiques we&rsquo;ve discussed here, especially on a gender front. One important caveat is that I have not seen any of the other <em>Star Is Born</em> movies. I come to the 2018 version with no understanding or opinion of the way the formula has played out in the past. But&nbsp;Jackson was very clearly in rough shape before he met Ally, and she was very clearly remarkably talented &mdash; I don&rsquo;t see the movie as showing her success as causing, or even blossoming from, his downfall.</p>

<p>Meanwhile, I appreciate that the movie doesn&rsquo;t cast her as his savior &mdash; he continues to drink and be destructive despite the fact that he has &ldquo;a good woman&rsquo;s love.&rdquo; It also doesn&rsquo;t cast her as naive about his ability to overcome his demons. She sets a boundary with him early on: She won&rsquo;t get on his motorcycle if he&rsquo;s been drinking. And when she visits him in rehab, she acknowledges that him coming back home to live with her might not work. There are a lot of ways her character could have been a passive enabler of his addiction, or a Pollyanna hoping to help him overcome his problems, and she was neither of those.</p>

<p>All that being said, I really appreciate the concerns that Aja and Constance raise &mdash; it is so important to interrogate pop culture on these issues, especially pop culture that is as spectacle-heavy as <em>A Star Is Born</em>.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Could future versions see the story differently?</h2>
<p><strong>Alissa: </strong>It&rsquo;s interesting to me that this is such a well-trodden story in Hollywood, and yet it&rsquo;s sparking robust conversations like this one. I have been thinking a lot about how this version of the story concerns two Hollywood archetypes &mdash; the tragic artist on the one hand, the ingenue on the other &mdash; while the film itself is <em>also</em> a Hollywood archetype: the long-simmering passion project, in this case for Bradley Cooper. That&rsquo;s one way you win an Oscar: get people to think of your film as being in the mold of other great Hollywood archetypes.</p>

<p>That said, I&rsquo;m curious whether you think this is the natural end of the <em>Star Is Born</em> story, or whether there&rsquo;s space for other iterations. And if there was another one &mdash; say, in 2039 &mdash; what would you hope to see it explore?</p>

<p><strong>Constance: </strong>I would love to see a version of <em>A Star Is Born</em> that decouples the professional mentorship from a straightforward romance. It could still be a love story &mdash; mentorship requires a kind of love, right? But without the romantic elements, the power dynamics of the relationship would shift in compelling ways. It might stop feeling so gendered and become a generational story instead: What does the ascendent generation owe to the past, and vice versa? How do you navigate that fraught balance of gratitude and resentment and hope and fear without it turning toxic? I think that version of the story could be just as sweeping as the 2018 version, and it has the potential to have a clearer emotional throughline, to boot.</p>
<img src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/13051103/star5.jpg?quality=90&#038;strip=all&#038;crop=0,0,100,100" alt="Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga in A Star Is Born." title="Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga in A Star Is Born." data-has-syndication-rights="1" data-caption="Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga in &lt;em&gt;A Star Is Born.&lt;/em&gt; | Warner Bros." data-portal-copyright="Warner Bros." />
<p><strong>Eleanor:</strong> Constance, I love that idea. Funnily enough, I saw <em>My Fair Lady</em> on Broadway a day or two after I watched <em>A Star Is Born</em>, which in a <em>very</em> broad sense follows the contours of what you&rsquo;re describing here. And it shows us the ways that a professional mentorship story can have really messed-up gender dynamics too! Which is all the more reason that a story like you&rsquo;re describing could be fascinating &mdash; especially<strong> </strong>one that deals with #MeToo. It would also<strong> </strong>be interesting if the two stars were of the same gender, to remove some of the &ldquo;will they or won&rsquo;t they&rdquo; positioning that might feel inevitable if they were opposite gender.</p>

<p><strong>Aja: </strong>This is really ironic because there <em>is</em> a version of <em>A Star Is Born</em> that does exactly what you&rsquo;re talking about &mdash; the very first one I mentioned before, <em>What Price Hollywood?</em> And that&rsquo;s precisely what makes the film (from 1934) so interesting compared to every version that comes after it: The relationship between the two stars is purely professional and completely platonic, and she supports him through his decline and addiction as a loyal and grateful friend and mentee.</p>

<p>While the movie is unabashedly terrible when it comes to handling her romantic life, its resistance to pairing them romantically makes the tragedy of their friendship much starker: She gets to have her independence recognized without being seen as an extension of him because of the kind of weight the later narratives place on their romance. <em>What Price Hollywood?</em> explicitly deals with this &ldquo;fraught balance of gratitude and resentment and hope and fear&rdquo; by forcing its female lead (played by Constance Bennett) to grapple with the question of whether she should set her own life on fire to keep her friend warm. And it <em>is</em> a generational story to a degree, in that he&rsquo;s from the older generation of filmmakers who are seeing their artistic vision replaced by younger up-and-comers.</p>

<p>It&rsquo;s worth noting that <em>What Price Hollywood?</em> &mdash;&nbsp;as well as the most famous and weepiest version of <em>A Star Is Born</em>, the 1954 Judy Garland version &mdash; are both directed by George Cukor, who&rsquo;s a master at threading the needle on complicated gender dynamics. To me, that&rsquo;s another indicator that the things that hinder this narrative are things that can be jettisoned without losing the main idea, because they&rsquo;ve been added into the plot over time.</p>

<p>One thing that would be a ridiculously easy fix: having a woman write the screenplay. In fact, after <em>What Price Hollywood?</em>, only two women have worked on the <em>Star Is Born</em> story: Dorothy Parker and Joan Didion, who contributed to the 1937 and 1976 versions, respectively. And I feel strongly that the points we&rsquo;ve raised about how much the film revolves around the male lead&rsquo;s gaze on the star could be so easily mollified, complicated, and even erased, if we&rsquo;d just let a woman tell this story on her own terms.</p>

<p>The weird musical genre complications of the 2018 film could be even more thoroughly teased out and dealt with, without assigning an inherently superior status to the rock-folk-country lineage over the urban-hip-hop-pop-industrial lineage that is part of what makes the second half of the film frustrating. And of course, as Eleanor said, you could &mdash; gasp! &mdash; make this a queer story, a messier and more romantic <em>Devil Wears Prada</em> for the times. The Devil Sings Gaga.</p>

<p>Finally, I just want to emphasize that we don&rsquo;t have to wait to write this story, and we shouldn&rsquo;t.&nbsp;We should have had it in 2018, and that&rsquo;s why I don&rsquo;t think <em>A Star Is Born</em> should win Best Picture.&nbsp;This story needs a serious update before it will deserve that trophy.</p>

<p>And a note on the consent issue, if I may: The thing about consent is that when we teach men, in circumstances that don&rsquo;t involve romance, that a &ldquo;no&rdquo; means &ldquo;just pester me until I say yes anyway,&rdquo; then they behave as though that&rsquo;s what &ldquo;no&rdquo; means in circumstances that <em>do</em>&nbsp;involve romance. That&rsquo;s <a href="https://fugitivus.wordpress.com/2009/06/26/another-post-about-rape-3/">what rape culture is</a>. So it would be amazing to see this story acknowledge all the ways that undermining a woman&rsquo;s autonomy impacts her both in her career and in her personal life, even if it&rsquo;s done with the best of intentions.</p>

<p><strong>Alissa: </strong>I&rsquo;m actually pretty sure we&rsquo;ll get another <em>Star Is Born</em> in our lifetimes, so I&rsquo;m hoping whoever makes it considers these responses. As I said <a href="https://www.vox.com/2018/9/14/17835796/star-is-born-review-lady-gaga-bradley-cooper">when I reviewed the film</a> in September, it&rsquo;s different from its predecessors in that it&rsquo;s more interested in the stars&rsquo; relationships than in the star-making machine, and that seems like a good catapult into another version of the story in the future. There&rsquo;s clearly something compelling enough about the core narrative that we keep revisiting this story. Maybe, eventually, one will win Best Picture.</p>
<hr class="wp-block-separator" />
<p>Check out what our roundtable participants had to say about all eight Best Picture nominees:</p>

<p><a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2019/2/19/18222080/black-panther-oscars-2019-best-picture-win-lose"><em>Black Panther</em></a><em> | </em><a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2019/2/20/18222082/blackkklansman-oscars-2019-best-picture-win-lose"><em>BlacKkKlansman</em></a><em> | </em><a href="https://www.vox.com/2019/2/21/18222084/bohemian-rhapsody-best-picture-oscars-2019-win-lose"><em>Bohemian Rhapsody</em></a><em> | </em><a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2019/2/20/18222092/favourite-best-picture-oscars-2019-win-lose"><em>The Favourite</em></a><em> | </em><a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2019/2/19/18222085/green-book-oscars-2019-best-picture-win-lose-controversy"><em>Green Book</em></a><em> | </em><a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2019/2/19/18225326/roma-oscars-2019-best-picture-win-lose"><em>Roma</em></a><em> | </em><a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2019/2/22/18222090/star-is-born-oscars-2019-best-picture-win-lose"><em>A Star Is Born</em></a><em> | </em><a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2019/2/20/18222089/vice-oscars-2019-best-picture-win-lose"><em>Vice</em></a><em> </em></p>
						]]>
									</content>
			
					</entry>
			<entry>
			
			<author>
				<name>Alex Abad-Santos</name>
			</author>
			
			<author>
				<name>Emily St. James</name>
			</author>
			
			<author>
				<name>Constance Grady</name>
			</author>
			
			<author>
				<name>Eleanor Barkhorn</name>
			</author>
			
			<author>
				<name>Aja Romano</name>
			</author>
			
			<title type="html"><![CDATA[10 years later, is The Hunger Games still shocking?]]></title>
			<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/12/19/18136112/hunger-games-10-year-anniversary" />
			<id>https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/12/19/18136112/hunger-games-10-year-anniversary</id>
			<updated>2021-05-15T04:03:40-04:00</updated>
			<published>2018-12-19T17:00:08-05:00</published>
			<category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Books" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Culture" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Movies" />
							<summary type="html"><![CDATA[Ten years ago this fall, children&#8217;s author Suzanne Collins published The Hunger Games, a creepy, insidious story about a dystopian government that forces children to fight in a gladiatorial death match and broadcasts the whole thing on TV. And that book &#8212;&#160;and its two follow-up sequels, 2009&#8217;s Catching Fire and 2010&#8217;s Mockingjay &#8212;&#160;became a phenomenon. [&#8230;]]]></summary>
			
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<img alt="" data-caption="Josh Hutcherson, Elizabeth Banks, and Jennifer Lawrence in The Hunger Games: Catching Fire. | Murray Close/Lionsgate" data-portal-copyright="Murray Close/Lionsgate" data-has-syndication-rights="1" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/13638865/Hunger_Games.jpg?quality=90&#038;strip=all&#038;crop=0,0,100,100" />
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	Josh Hutcherson, Elizabeth Banks, and Jennifer Lawrence in The Hunger Games: Catching Fire. | Murray Close/Lionsgate	</figcaption>
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<p>Ten years ago this fall, children&rsquo;s author Suzanne Collins published <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Hunger-Games-Book/dp/0439023483"><em>The Hunger Games</em></a>, a creepy, insidious story about a dystopian government that forces children to fight in a gladiatorial death match and broadcasts the whole thing on TV. And that book &mdash;&nbsp;and its two follow-up sequels, 2009&rsquo;s <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Catching-Fire-Hunger-Games-2/dp/0545586178"><em>Catching Fire</em></a> and 2010&rsquo;s <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Mockingjay-Hunger-Games-Suzanne-Collins/dp/0439023513/"><em>Mockingjay</em></a> &mdash;&nbsp;became a phenomenon.</p>

<p>The <em>Hunger Games</em> books were giant best-sellers, and the movie adaptations were blockbusters. Together, the two series<strong> </strong>kicked off the YA dystopian boom of the late 2000s. They became a pop culture shorthand for stories of inequality and scarcity. <a href="https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2847503/Ferguson-protesters-scrawl-Hunger-Games-slogan-landmark-tense-town-waits-grand-jury-decision-indicting-Darren-Willson-killing-Michael-Brown.html">They created slogans that were used in actual protest movements</a>. They helped launch Jennifer Lawrence to megastardom.</p>

<p>Ten years out from the <em>Hunger Games</em> phenomenon, it&rsquo;s time to look back and reevaluate. To that end, Vox culture writers Constance Grady, Aja Romano, and Alex Abad-Santos joined managing editor Eleanor Barkhorn and critic at large Emily VanDerWerff to talk the whole thing through. Does this franchise live up to the hype? Is it actually good, or was it all talk? And at the end of the day, are we Team Peeta or Team Gale?</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Here’s what <em>The Hunger Games</em> does really well</h2>
<p><strong>Constance:</strong> I still remember the exact moment <em>The Hunger Games</em> got me.</p>

<p>When I started reading the first book, I didn&rsquo;t like it all that much. I thought the premise of children being forced to murder each other on a reality TV show sounded gross and trashy and exploitative, and I thought Suzanne Collins&rsquo;s sentences were clunky and inelegant.</p>

<p>And because I didn&rsquo;t respect the book, I was skimming as I read, so I missed all the telling details that deepened Katniss&rsquo;s characterization in the first few pages, like the scene where she befriends a wildcat and you think she&rsquo;s going to pick up an adorable animal companion, and instead she chases it away with stones because it&rsquo;s scaring away the game. That passage tells us an enormous amount about the brutal pragmatism and unlikability that makes Katniss such a specific and unusual protagonist, and I skipped right over it the first time I read the book because I didn&rsquo;t care to look for it.</p>

<p>Here&rsquo;s what got me: Katniss had reached the Capitol and was going through her press interviews, and I was getting bored and thinking about maybe putting the book down. Then Peeta took the stage and gave his interview, and announced that he was in love with Katniss. &ldquo;Oh,&rdquo; I thought. &ldquo;That&rsquo;s a fun and tropey little love story. I&rsquo;m a sucker for star-crossed lovers. This book is still trashy, but I&rsquo;ll keep reading for a bit.&rdquo;</p>

<p>Then I turned the page and realized that the love story was a tactic, that it was designed to make the audience within the book, watching the Hunger Games on TV, react exactly the same way that I, reading the book, reacted: to make them say, &ldquo;Oh, how sweet,&rdquo; and pay attention for a minute longer.</p>

<p>For me, this is the genius of <em>The Hunger Games</em>: It&rsquo;s able to make me incredibly aware of my own emotional reactions to storytelling tropes, and then it creates enough distance that I can interrogate my reactions. Whom do I consider worthy of my attention? What violence truly hurts me, and what violence do I ignore? What makes a person&rsquo;s death a tragedy? <em>The Hunger Games</em> creates exactly the state of mind I need to think those issues through.</p>

<p>And it always leaves me hyperaware that I&rsquo;m not Katniss, not even close. I&rsquo;m in the Capitol. I have to respect the guts of a book willing to make that fact so clear.</p>

<p>Does <em>The Hunger Games</em> work as a way of thinking through big questions for you, or does it still feel a little trashy or overwrought? And if it got you, how did it get you?</p>

<p><strong>Aja: </strong>The moment that got me, or maybe the series of moments, was absolutely the way that Cinna, Katniss&rsquo;s image consultant, weaponized her dresses throughout the start of the competition. I think for me &mdash; as someone who is really not typically into dystopia and high fantasy, because the language and codes of those stories often feel very removed from present-day reality &mdash; the localizing ideas in <em>The Hunger Games </em>really started to come through for me in those moments. They conveyed that this is a story about people consciously manipulating their public images and using fashion as a mode of survival in a society that has become entirely image-obsessed. It all felt very concrete, in ways that science fiction usually doesn&rsquo;t for me.</p>

<p>This series definitely does feel, if not exactly trashy, then like a series whose carefully orchestrated ideas don&rsquo;t ever quite come together fully or smoothly. I think one reason for that is that <em>The Hunger Games</em> is a YA series, so Collins also has to include a proverbial love triangle. I think another reason is that her action scenes and the plot by which we watch contestants fall to the Games can feel plodding and procedural, and far-fetched in the moments of climax.</p>

<p>But I also think there&rsquo;s enough naturalism within the <em>Battle Royale</em> scenario that it balances out the robot birds and terrifying remote-controlled robot wolves. I think Collins took great care to make the Capitol especially feel like it could be any current city, rather than something very stylized and futuristic. And that impression of the city as this vapid but very real place, where the people who succeed have learned to manipulate its superficiality, has stuck with me ever since.</p>

<p>I also think Katniss is Collins&rsquo;s greatest weapon: You really believe this girl is a determined strategist who can manipulate and bluff her way to victory in the final moments of the first book, and I think the faith she earns from readers in book one helps us navigate the many weaker moments in the rest of the series. Katniss keeps the whole thing grounded.</p>

<p><strong>Alex: </strong>I think the clever genius of the trilogy is that it&rsquo;s<em> </em><a href="https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0266308/"><em>Battle Royale</em></a>, but you actually care about the kids in it. <em>Battle Royale</em> did well to establish a dystopian future where adults control the youth through the annual Battle Royale. And while it&rsquo;s a bloody concept and I was horrified when they died, I don&rsquo;t think I really cared about or connected with the kids in <em>Battle Royale</em> the way I did with the kids in <em>The</em> <em>Hunger Games</em>.</p>

<p>That&rsquo;s the genius of Collins: You get really invested in the characters to the point where you root for certain ones to live and root for certain ones to die. Like, Clove was a nasty piece of work, and I felt a dark relief and satisfaction when Thresh not only concussed her to death but did so to save Katniss and avenge Rue. Collins can also turn that feeling inside out and make you root for the charismatic Finnick or the damaged but loyal Johanna.</p>

<p>Collins taps into a kind of wish fulfillment &mdash; that you could imagine yourself winning the Games and be the exception. In reality, I would probably be most like Glimmer and die when Katniss drops a bunch of bees on my bitchy head. But that doesn&rsquo;t stop me from thinking I could win it all, and somehow avoid the life of prostitution or drug abuse that awaits winners.</p>

<p>She makes the horrific concept of the Games alluring, which is the fantastic, insidious conceit when you realize that&rsquo;s the entire point.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Is the <em>Hunger Games</em> discourse overhyped?</h2>
<p><strong>Eleanor:</strong> I am on record as being a bit of a <a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/11/21/18096734/twilight-10-year-anniversary-stephanie-meyers"><em>Hunger Games</em> hater</a>. But as I was reading what Constance, Aja, and Alex wrote above, I started to question why. Katniss <em>is</em> a really compelling character! Collins <em>does </em>do a really nice job of not letting the reader off the hook! The series <em>is</em> a canny subversion of the love triangle trope!</p>

<p>And then I realized &mdash; what bugs me about <em>The Hunger Games</em> is not really the series itself; it&rsquo;s the entire ponderous, reductive discourse it launched. For a while there, everyone had a theory on how <em>The Hunger Games</em> applied to post-recession America. Panem&rsquo;s indulgent, out-of-touch Capitol was exactly like indulgent, out-of-touch <a href="https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/2012/11/26/hunger-games-washington-economy-glenn-reynolds/1725783/">Washington, DC</a>! Also <a href="https://www.standard.co.uk/lifestyle/london-life/welcome-to-the-capitol-why-theres-a-significant-parallel-between-the-hunger-games-and-life-in-london-9578510.html">London</a>. The nadir came when Dan from<em> Gossip Girl </em>called <em>The Hunger Games</em> <a href="https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/03/21/hunger-games-penn-badgley-occupy-wall-street_n_1371270.html">a metaphor</a> for Occupy Wall Street.</p>

<p>Even now, a decade later, the phrase &ldquo;Hunger Games&rdquo; is regularly used as a shorthand for any situation where there&rsquo;s competition for resources. (Just this year: The Washington Post called DC&rsquo;s school lottery &ldquo;<a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/dc-school-lottery-an-academic-hunger-games-parents-are-desperate-to-win/2018/02/26/f1371f60-1b16-11e8-ae5a-16e60e4605f3_story.html?utm_term=.562f74807bcc">an academic Hunger Games</a>,&rdquo; CNN referred to Amazon&rsquo;s HQ2 quest as &ldquo;<a href="https://www.cnn.com/videos/politics/2018/11/18/sotu-cartoonion-full.cnn">the Hunger Games</a>,&rdquo; and Stephen Colbert brought back his <a href="https://slate.com/culture/2018/07/stephen-colberts-hunger-games-julius-flickerman-on-scott-pruitt-video.html">Julius Flickerman character</a> to compare the revolving door of President Trump&rsquo;s Cabinet to the Hunger Games.)</p>

<p>I know it&rsquo;s not completely fair to judge a franchise for the way people talk about it. It&rsquo;s like hating a band because its fans are annoying (and I love Dave Matthews Band &mdash; or at least &ldquo;Crash Into Me&rdquo;). But all the lazy takes have made me wonder if, in fact, <em>The Hunger Games </em>was also lazy &mdash; a simplistic critique of economic equality masquerading as something deep.</p>

<p>What do you think? Is <em>The Hunger Games</em>&rsquo; critique of contemporary media and capitalism useful? And what do we do when the conversation around a franchise becomes bigger than the franchise itself?</p>

<p><strong>Emily: </strong>I think it&rsquo;s interesting to note that <em>The Hunger Games</em> sort of accidentally gave us a way to talk about something people could feel intuitively but struggled to put into words &mdash; namely, a growing income gap between the haves and have-nots, and an ever-sharpening divide between cities and rural areas.</p>

<p>I don&rsquo;t know how much of this Collins intended. After all, any good dystopia needs a significant gap between those who have power and money and those who do not. But these sorts of pop culture works go supernova, as <em>The Hunger Games</em> did for a brief time, because they find a way to express the things we&rsquo;re worried about in our own world via the safe confines of storytelling. Or, put another way, it became easier to understand real life as an extension of <em>The Hunger Games</em> than it was to understand <em>The Hunger Games</em> as an extension of real life. (Famously, Collins <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/books/2012/apr/27/suzanne-collins-hunger-games-profile">conceived of the book</a> when channel-flipping between Iraq War footage and reality shows.)</p>

<p>I suspect that the way the stories became conversational shorthand is due to how canny Collins is about the exact thing those conversations rarely touched on: television production. <em>The Hunger Games</em> is shot through with the knowledge of somebody who used to work in the TV industry, and Collins is always careful to ground the story Katniss is trying to sell within the larger stories and strategies that everybody around her is plugging away at. And it understands how pop culture is used to prop up all aspects of the social order, even the horrible, unjust ones. This is why, for me, the second book is the most frustrating: In its desire to plunge the characters back into the Hunger Games arena, it loses sight of these larger satirical devices.</p>

<p>But it&rsquo;s also why I love <em>Mockingjay</em> best of the three books. (Yes. I know.) It&rsquo;s a slog, but an intentional one, and as it rolls toward its preordained conclusion, Collins gets at something about how even the least predictable narrative twists and turns have a sort of glum inevitability to them. I don&rsquo;t think it&rsquo;s a particularly great book in the way the first one is, but it&rsquo;s a book that tries so much more than you would ever expect. Collins is really, really good at having horror slide right by you in the middle of a sentence or two, a style that took a while to gel for me but that I eventually really got into. She&rsquo;s probably not a strong enough prose stylist to make the final turns hit as hard as they could have, but that weakness weirdly ends up being an advantage.</p>

<p>However, it&rsquo;s also impossible to talk about why <em>The Hunger Games</em> blew up without talking about a different woman who was important in its rise to fame: Jennifer Lawrence, the first genuine movie star minted in the 2010s and someone whose career has extended past this particular franchise. It might be my least favorite of the three books, but <em>Catching Fire</em> was a terrifically entertaining film, precisely for the reasons that it sort of dragged on the page. (In movie form, it almost seemed a snide critique of franchise filmmaking!) How do the movies compare to the books for all of you?</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading"><em>The Hunger Games</em> is the rare franchise where both books and movies have their partisans</h2>
<p><strong>Aja: </strong>Before we jump to J-Law, I want to add one more thing about the real-life economics that surrounded <em>The Hunger Games.</em> I think it&rsquo;s particularly fascinating that a book series whose resistance movement was so frequently compared to Occupy Wall Street spawned a movie franchise that yielded absolutely straight-faced marketing tie-ins that aligned so unironically with the brazen capitalism of the Capitol that they caused <a href="http://capitolcouture.pn/post/53392754578/a-brief-spotlight-on-cinna-the-man-who-set-the">fan</a> <a href="https://www.thehpalliance.org/success_stories_odds_in_our_favor">protests</a> in response.</p>

<p>These included an entire &ldquo;<a href="http://74th.capitolcouture.pn/">Capitol Couture</a>&rdquo; line of ready-to-wear fashion; a line of <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/nov/22/hunger-games-catching-fire-covergirl-subway-nerf-ads">Cover Girl makeup</a> that created a different &ldquo;look&rdquo; to accompany each of the starving and marginalized districts of Panem, including a special Capitol line; a <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/womens-blog/2013/nov/12/hunger-games-bow-arrow-toy-girls-catching-fire-christmas">pink archer&rsquo;s bow Hasbro toy</a> aimed at young girls, for those moments when you want to express your girlish charm while hunting wildlife to feed your starving family; and two food-related products: a <a href="https://www.denofgeek.com/us/movies/the-hunger-games/226587/the-hunger-games-subway-and-a-tie-in-that-misses-the-point">partnership with Subway</a> and <a href="https://www.buzzfeed.com/arianelange/a-ranking-of-the-hunger-games-chocolates">upscale <em>Hunger Games</em> chocolate</a>.</p>

<p>The <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/nov/22/hunger-games-catching-fire-covergirl-subway-nerf-ads">level</a> of <a href="https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2014/06/hunger-games-advertising-bad-guys">bafflement</a> these marketing campaigns produced, inviting queries about whether they were somehow being <a href="https://www.wired.com/2013/11/catching-fire-marketing/">intentionally ironic</a> (they weren&rsquo;t), was exactly the portrait of bleak nihilism that made <em>Mockingjay</em> so devastatingly fitting as a series ending. (I know! But I agree with Emily!) They blithely, consciously missed the entire point of the series in a way the series itself anticipated &mdash; not to mention a way that also seems like the perfect presaging of the post-ironic, post-dystopian reality we have entered since.</p>

<p>And that constant sense of ironic self-awareness is also why the movie franchise works so well &mdash; better than the books, for me. Again, that starts with Katniss.</p>

<p>Before she was cast, I had seen and loved Lawrence for her devastating performance in <em>Winter&rsquo;s Bone</em>, where she basically plays a proto-Katniss. So I was constantly marveling at the way the media completely ignored how perfectly this previous breakout role had positioned her to play Katniss, and instead dissected her ability to play the part <a href="https://www.denverpost.com/2012/03/28/people-jennifer-lawrence-too-fat-and-blonde-for-hunger-games/">solely based on</a> her weight, her blondness, her attitude, her public persona. (Meanwhile, <a href="https://medium.com/@pugoverlord/yes-the-hunger-games-is-about-race-stop-saying-it-isnt-e9edfb04b6f8">critiques</a> that fans made about how Katniss in the books is <a href="http://celticcherokee.tumblr.com/post/71232443401/katniss-everdeen-person-of-color-character">somewhat coded as a person of color</a> were essentially overlooked.) Once again, the series had already anticipated this: The media&rsquo;s dismissal of Lawrence&rsquo;s abilities based on superficial reasons directly played into how effective she was in the role, exactly like Katniss herself.</p>

<p>Honestly, despite how frequently <em>The Hunger Games</em> fumbled its plot points in execution, Collins&rsquo;s deep meta-awareness of society as a high-concept production, and the way she built those reminders into the books &mdash; literally from the ground up; remember the hidden cameras buried in the ground all around the arena? &mdash; meant that once the machine of filmmaking got underway, all those elements just kept paying dividends.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">How about that J-Law!</h2>
<p><strong>Constance: </strong>Jennifer Lawrence&rsquo;s casting, for me, epitomizes both the best and the worst of the movie adaptations, and the way they smoothed out so much of what was spiky and unpleasant in the books. Unlike Aja and Emily, I&rsquo;m more a book partisan than a movie partisan for this franchise &mdash; with the exception of <em>Catching Fire</em>, which I agree is a terrific movie and a so-so book &mdash; but Jennifer Lawrence&rsquo;s Katniss is both everything I love about the movies and everything I wish they had done differently.</p>

<p>Book Katniss is very pointedly a child. She&rsquo;s starving to death, she&rsquo;s potentially a person of color (there&rsquo;s <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/tagged/poc-katniss">a popular fan theory</a> that she&rsquo;s meant to be read as a person of Native descent), and after she&rsquo;s caught in an explosion in the first Hunger Games, she becomes hard of hearing.</p>

<p>Movie Katniss is a beautiful, glowing young woman who is the picture of health, and who is emphatically white. (Notably, <a href="https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/03/01/hunger-games-movie_n_1314053.html">the studio refused to consider any nonwhite actresses when casting Katniss</a>.) The things that make Katniss especially vulnerable in the books &mdash;&nbsp;her childishness, her lack of nourishment, her nonwhiteness, her disability &mdash;&nbsp;just don&rsquo;t exist in the movies. That makes it harder to be grossed out when you see her in the arena, because you don&rsquo;t really feel that she&rsquo;s a child, or that the arena is permanently and physically changing her, or that she&rsquo;s at the mercy of a bunch of well-nourished rich white kids.</p>

<p>And in general, these movies tend to shy away from any exploration of power that is more nuanced than &ldquo;some people have a lot of money and other people don&rsquo;t.&rdquo; They take a certain pleasure in spectacle, and they&rsquo;re never quite able to distance themselves from<strong> </strong>that pleasure so that the audience can interrogate it, the way Collins distances her readers from the spectacle in the books.</p>

<p>The movies are just never willing to let Panem feel as gross as it feels in the books. They want us to enjoy watching Katniss be beautiful and badass without feeling like we are exploiting her, and they want us to experience Panem&rsquo;s horror on an individual level (it is mean to these particular people, and that is bad because we like them) rather than on a systemic level (it is a system designed to withhold power from these particular groups of people, which makes it much like our own).</p>

<p>But having said all that: Jennifer Lawrence is absolutely extraordinary as Katniss. She&rsquo;s able to be callous and withholding to everyone around her and also completely vulnerable to the camera, so that we always understand exactly how damaged Katniss is and why, and we also see why the people around her might not. The choices she makes as an actress do a lot of work pushing back against the movies&rsquo; tendency to make Katniss into a blank-faced action hero (&ldquo;Please remember that after Katniss shoots a bow and kills someone, her face cannot be badass,&rdquo; <a href="https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2011/11/jennifer-lawrence-the-hunger-games-twilight">she told director Gary Ross when she was in auditions</a>), and she has the kind of unforced charisma that makes it easy to understand why Katniss is such a valuable propaganda tool.</p>

<p>These movies might focus more on individual trauma than on systemic oppression, but Lawrence&rsquo;s performance is so grounded and so emotionally authentic that Katniss&rsquo;s trauma is always present and incredibly visceral.</p>

<p><strong>Alex:</strong> I don&rsquo;t think we can talk about casting without talking about the man I like to call &ldquo;Potato Finnick.&rdquo; Like she did with Katniss, Collins does a great job of describing the main characters (aside from Primrose, whom I literally cannot remember anything about) in a way that not only sticks in your head but also lets your imagination work. With Finnick, I was picturing vintage Jude Law or a young Ryan Gosling or Jesse Williams as the charismatic fisher prince from District 4.</p>

<p>But alas, we got none of those. Yes, I understand some of those dream castings are impossible without a time machine, but I was hoping we&rsquo;d get someone memorable enough to rival those images in my head.</p>

<p>And instead we got &hellip; well&nbsp;&hellip; can you name the actor who plays Finnick (without Googling)?</p>

<p>How well did the casting department do when it comes to the rest of the characters? I cannot be the only one who is still holding out hope for a spinoff for Jena Malone&rsquo;s Johanna Mason. I refuse to believe it.</p>

<p><strong>Emily: </strong>Excuse me, Alex, but I absolutely remember the name of Sam Claflin. Now, that&rsquo;s almost certainly just because I have stupidly trained my brain to remember the names of actors, and not because I&rsquo;ve just loved him in his post-<em>Hunger Games</em> roles, like &ldquo;the guy in that one romantic movie also starring Emilia Clarke.&rdquo; But I do remember his name! (I&rsquo;m also not really the person to consult on this, but I think he&rsquo;s a very handsome fella.)</p>

<p>I go back and forth on the movies. The first is a wonderful announcement of a star arriving onscreen (to think that I initially thought Emily Browning should star! Please absolve me of my sins!), but Ross is a clunky action director, and he never finds a way to capture the over-the-top lavishness of what the Capitol is supposed to represent.</p>

<p>The second is the one where everything clicks. Francis Lawrence (no relation to Jennifer) is a stronger action director; the ways the story critiques existing power structures fits more easily into typical Hollywood storytelling tropes; and Jennifer Lawrence gives one of her best performances (arguably better than the one in 2012&rsquo;s <em>Silver Linings Playbook</em><strong> </strong>that won her an Oscar). Plus, the last 20 minutes or so create this headlong rush toward whatever the next movie is going to be, a sense that the world is coming apart at the seams and real change is possible.</p>

<p>The problem, of course, is that Collins&rsquo;s cynicism &mdash; in which all new bosses become the old boss, because the channels that power has carved in our society are so very deep and hard to fill in &mdash; is precisely the wrong kind of cynicism to try to depict in a Hollywood film.</p>

<p>Both <em>Mockingjay</em> movies are &hellip; fine, but their attempts to adapt the book mostly straightforwardly reveal how the movies never quite found a way to build a larger political philosophy of their own universe. That was fine in the first two films, where Katniss is only slowly getting her education, but the last two films need to be about Katniss realizing how little will actually change due to her actions. She gets to be alive. That&rsquo;s about it.</p>

<p>It&rsquo;s not that Hollywood movies, and even Hollywood blockbusters, can&rsquo;t handle a darkly cynical tone. But it&rsquo;s <em>much</em> harder to tell cynical, big-budget stories that are, in essence, about how this sort of storytelling creates easily digestible tales of heroes and villains that ignore how the rich and powerful will always be rich and powerful, and if you somehow join them, your interests will suddenly shift, unless you are an incredibly strong-willed person. And even then &hellip;</p>

<p>Hollywood struggles to tell stories like this because Hollywood hates to think about being part of the problem. <em>The Hunger Games</em> worked as a storytelling skeleton when its haves and have-nots were abstract depictions of some other world&rsquo;s problems. But, paradoxically, the closer the series got to depicting problems in our world, the more Hollywood seemed afraid of implicating itself.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Every YA franchise has to have a ship war</h2>
<p><strong>Constance:</strong> While we&rsquo;re dealing with casting, I think one of the issues that really hobbled the movies is that none of the young male cast is anywhere near Lawrence&rsquo;s level. I think that&rsquo;s one of the reasons the love triangle tends to get dismissed as silly YA nonsense: No offense to Liam Hemsworth as Gale or Josh Hutcherson as Peeta, but neither of them is at Jennifer Lawrence&rsquo;s level of charisma. So whenever you see her onscreen with one of them, it&rsquo;s like you&rsquo;re watching a lioness casually swat around a field mouse. There&rsquo;s just no comparison.</p>

<p>But I&rsquo;ve always had a bit of a soft spot for the love triangle, in part because it was my way into the franchise to begin with, and in part because I think it&rsquo;s actually a really effective tool for character exploration. Whatever boy Katniss is leaning toward at a given moment tells us an enormous amount about what she thinks of herself at any given time, and her complete inability to express what she feels to either one of them is one of her more heartbreaking traits.</p>

<p>In particular, I&rsquo;ve always appreciated that Peeta, whose primary characteristics all code as feminine, gets to be the romantic male lead in this grim and gritty action franchise: He&rsquo;s the empathetic one who is a good communicator and a good cook and an artist, basically. Those are all valuable traits that this franchise respects, and they are all absolutely what would normally be assigned to &ldquo;the girlfriend&rdquo; in a male-led franchise.</p>

<p>Or maybe I just identify with Peeta because I too love bread and I too would die for Katniss. Either way.</p>

<p>What about you: Team Peeta or Team Gale? Or (dark horse) Team Johanna? (Gotta agree with Alex, I would absolutely watch a Johanna spinoff.)</p>

<p><strong>Alex:</strong> Gale blew up Katniss&rsquo;s sister. How could anyone be Team Gale? Peeta may be a little needy, and his main survival skill is painting himself as a rock, but Gale is a fuckboy. Gale made Katniss&rsquo;s life more difficult with each action he took.</p>

<p>Like, could you imagine being Katniss and outlasting all your fellow teenage murderers, getting stung by mutated bees, watching your childhood friend die, and then having to deal with Gale claiming you&rsquo;re not spending enough time with him and that his feelings are hurt?</p>

<p>Thank u, next.</p>

<p>And <em>then</em> when you go back into the Hunger Games, he&rsquo;s out there acting foolish and decides he wants to be <em>the</em> man? And because he&rsquo;s a fantastic idiot, he bombs your little sister, a.k.a. the entire reason you&rsquo;re in the Games?</p>

<p>To be honest, I&rsquo;m not into Peeta and Katniss that much either, but the idea of those two being together is still better than Katniss being with Gale. Even if the <em>real</em> relationship should have been Peeta and Finnick forever.</p>

<p><strong>Eleanor: </strong>Eh, this is another reminder why I didn&rsquo;t love this series: The love triangle did not do it for me at all. Constance, I read your explanation of how it&rsquo;s a great tool for character explanation, and I get it on an intellectual level. But on a heart level, I just don&rsquo;t care! Love triangles are like jokes: If you have to explain them, something went wrong.</p>

<p>So I am neither Team Peeta nor Team Gale. I don&rsquo;t care about either of them. Team Katniss. Team &ldquo;don&rsquo;t do a love triangle unless you&rsquo;re really going to commit to it.&rdquo;</p>

<p><strong>Emily: </strong>I guess if forced to decide, I am Team Peeta because I like that Katniss goes for someone who can maybe sort of begin to understand her trauma, rather than someone more exciting. But in both the books and movies, I always liked that idea more in theory than execution.</p>

<p>I get what everybody involved was going for, but also, I&rsquo;m the kind of sadist who enjoys how badly Collins tries to make Team Gale fans feel bad about their life choices throughout the end of <em>Mockingjay</em>. &ldquo;Yes!&rdquo; I laugh, from atop my tower of mild Peeta affection. &ldquo;Suffer for your decisions!&rdquo;</p>

<p>But, really, what I wanted was for Haymitch and/or Effie to find love. Maybe together? Why not!</p>

<p><strong>Aja:</strong> Okay, okay, I stand ready to be mock(ingjay)ed for all my life choices, but hear me out. You know all the things that Constance very rightly points out above about how Collins uses the love triangle to posit two different versions of who Katniss could be? That kind of thematic complexity is usually what I live for and appreciate most about good romances, and especially well-done love triangles. But here, it doesn&#8217;t work for me at all. And not just because I actually thought Gale was a pretty good romantic foil for Katniss for most of the series (sue me), but because I also thought, for most of the series, that his philosophical role in the rebellion was also a pretty good foil for Collins&#8217;s political machinations.</p>

<p>I felt then and still feel now that Gale made some pretty valid points about the need for radical systemic disruption coming from outside the system, and seeing the ham-fisted way Collins not only exploded the ship (sorry) but made Gale himself the bearer of a needlessly ironic, overly Shakespearean moral about how violent protest is an inherently immoral slippery slope and &ldquo;both sides made some bad points&rdquo; was so deeply infuriating to me.</p>

<p>Like many people, in my case perhaps because I grew up around guns and soldiers, I honestly didn&#8217;t realize that I was apparently supposed to be growing more and more wary of Gale&#8217;s militant radicalization until the climax. But I was also reading <em>The Hunger Games</em> alongside Derrick Jensen&#8217;s critiques of the way violence is used as a socioeconomic tool. Jensen&rsquo;s <a href="https://www.derrickjensen.org/endgame/premises/">observation</a> that &#8220;violence done by those lower on the [social] hierarchy to those higher is unthinkable, and when it does occur is regarded with shock, horror, and the fetishization of the victims&#8221; made a really strong impression on me, including shoring up my skepticism of the moralization happening in the last book.</p>

<p>To me, although Collins&#8217;s use of the love triangle as an expression of her moral philosophies was an important literary tool that I respect, and although I especially appreciate what she did in terms of subverting gender norms with Peeta, I think it ultimately failed completely.</p>

<p>Collins ultimately took a high-handed approach to themes that she had built up with far greater complexity until that point &mdash; themes like the difficulty of resisting an oppressive system without resorting to the tactics of the oppressor, and the way the socioeconomic consequences of that resistance so often fall upon the most vulnerable members of society. But then it turned out that she&rsquo;d built up all those themes partly in order to paint radical resistance in the absolute worst light possible &mdash; and she mapped each of her ships onto the &ldquo;right&rdquo; and the &ldquo;wrong&rdquo; side of that facile political discourse. No matter what you think of Gale, he deserved better.</p>

<p>Am I suggesting <em>The Hunger Games</em> itself should have been more radical? Not exactly, but I think everyone who was struggling then and now to #resist in an increasingly violent political age also deserved a more nuanced, or at least less condescending, take on the use of violence as a tool for social change. Maybe not full-on <em>Braveheart</em>, but at least a little more <em>The Purge</em>.</p>
						]]>
									</content>
			
					</entry>
			<entry>
			
			<author>
				<name>Alex Abad-Santos</name>
			</author>
			
			<author>
				<name>Constance Grady</name>
			</author>
			
			<author>
				<name>Aja Romano</name>
			</author>
			
			<author>
				<name>Eleanor Barkhorn</name>
			</author>
			
			<title type="html"><![CDATA[Reckoning with Twilight, 10 years later]]></title>
			<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/11/21/18096734/twilight-10-year-anniversary-stephanie-meyers" />
			<id>https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/11/21/18096734/twilight-10-year-anniversary-stephanie-meyers</id>
			<updated>2018-11-21T10:26:27-05:00</updated>
			<published>2018-11-21T10:40:08-05:00</published>
			<category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Books" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Culture" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Movies" />
							<summary type="html"><![CDATA[Ten years ago this month, the first Twilight movie sparkled broodily into movie theaters. By then, the four-volume book series had already been published in full, made the best-seller lists several times over, and was safely established as a cult phenomenon for its target demographic of teen girls &#8212;&#160;but with that first movie, Twilight became [&#8230;]]]></summary>
			
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<img alt="" data-caption="Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson in Twilight. | Summit Entertainment" data-portal-copyright="Summit Entertainment" data-has-syndication-rights="1" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/13459341/Twilight.jpg?quality=90&#038;strip=all&#038;crop=0,0,100,100" />
	<figcaption>
	Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson in Twilight. | Summit Entertainment	</figcaption>
</figure>
<p>Ten years ago this month, the first <em>Twilight</em> movie sparkled broodily into movie theaters. By then, the four-volume book series had already been published in full, made the best-seller lists several times over, and was safely established as a cult phenomenon for its target demographic of teen girls &mdash;&nbsp;but with that first movie, <em>Twilight</em> became mainstream.</p>

<p>In the fall of 2008, America at large was introduced to the story of Bella Swan, teenage everygirl, and her fraught, star-crossed love for glitter-streaked vampire Edward Cullen. <em>Twilight</em> introduced us to Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson, and it continued the <em>Harry Potter</em> tradition of the YA book-to-movie franchise as a dominant box office force.</p>

<p>It also became a cultural flashpoint. Think piece after think piece by turn celebrated <em>Twilight</em>&rsquo;s cultural dominance, mocked its shimmery vampire mythology, and feared the effects that romanticizing its tortured, dysfunctional love story might have on its teen readers. In 2008, <em>Twilight</em> was adored, but it was also hated, feared, and mocked.</p>

<p>Here in 2018, we finally have room to get a little perspective on the whole thing. In celebration of the 10-year anniversary of the first <em>Twilight</em> movie, Vox culture writers Constance Grady, Alex Abad-Santos, and Aja Romano joined forces with deputy managing editor Eleanor Barkhorn to look back at the unlife and legacy of the <em>Twilight</em> phenomenon.</p>

<p><strong>Constance:</strong> When the first <em>Twilight</em> movie came out in 2008, I was 19, and I was positive that the entire franchise was a blight on the pop culture landscape. Before the movie even came out, I made up my mind about it. I read the posts about how <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/psychologist-the-movies/201111/relationship-violence-in-twilight">the Edward-Bella love story ticked all the boxes of an abusive relationship</a>; I shook my head over Stephenie Meyer&rsquo;s bland, boring sentences; I howled over the whole concept of everything that happened in <em>Breaking Dawn</em>. (He <em>chews the baby</em> out of her uterus!)</p>

<p>But I was also completely fascinated by the franchise. I couldn&rsquo;t stop thinking about it. I picked up the first book to see what the fuss was all about, and even though I thought the love story was creepy and the prose was blah and absolutely nothing happened until about three-quarters of the way through the book beyond some vampire baseball (<em>vampire baseball!</em>), I kept turning those pages. I was compelled. I couldn&rsquo;t help myself.</p>

<p>I hate-read every <em>Breaking Dawn</em> review, and every review of the movie. I developed opinions on Kristen Stewart (bit her lip too much) and Robert Pattinson (I appreciated his palpable hatred of the franchise). I spent so much emotional energy thinking about the whole <em>Twilight</em> thing that I was, for all intents and purposes, a fan. I was just a fan who hated it.</p>

<p>Looking back 10 years later, I don&rsquo;t think I was necessarily wrong about most of the things I disliked about the franchise then. Bella and Edward&rsquo;s relationship <em>does</em> have some disturbing power dynamics (which we&rsquo;ll get into in a bit). Myer&rsquo;s prose <em>is</em> pretty bland. The structure of the plot <em>is</em> bananas. (I was wrong about Kristen Stewart, though, and the way she was penalized for sometimes seeming mildly uncomfortable with the <em>Twilight</em> phenomenon while Pattinson was lauded for his outright hatred of it says a lot about gender politics circa 2008.)</p>

<p>But I also think that I clearly found <em>Twilight</em> really compelling when I was 19, and I was mad about that, because smart girls weren&rsquo;t supposed to like books and movies like <em>Twilight</em>. There&rsquo;s a weird, creepy eroticism to those books that is calibrated to speak precisely to the sexual and romantic fantasies of teenage girls, and I <em>was</em> a teenage girl. It did speak to me. And that pissed me off.</p>

<p>There are few pop cultural products that our society likes to shit on more than the pop culture created for teenage girls, and <em>Twilight</em> circa 2008 was the pinnacle of that phenomenon. This was a franchise that was built for teen girls, marketed to teen girls, and loved by teen girls, and because of that, it became accepted common knowledge that all correct-thinking people could only despise and revile it. So when I look back 10 years later, I find it difficult to untangle my hatred of <em>Twilight</em> from my own internalized misogyny, and from my profound and at the time unexamined belief that anything made for teenage girls must inherently be less-than.</p>

<p>How did you feel about <em>Twilight</em> back in 2008? Has it changed for you since then?</p>

<p><strong>Eleanor: </strong>I was 24 when the first movie came out, and I think being just past teenagehood made all the difference for me. I <em>loved</em> the movie &mdash; fully, earnestly, without irony, without reservations. I loved the moody Pacific Northwest setting. I loved the longing glances. I loved the vampire baseball! (But then I am a sucker for the &ldquo;characters with superpowers show off their superpowers&rdquo; scene that these movies always tend to have. Ask me how I felt watching Tobey Maguire leap from Queens rooftop to Queens rooftop in the 2002 <em>Spider-Man</em>.)</p>

<p>I had spent my teenage years full of feelings, full of angst, full of deep, painful crushes on mysterious boys. And I&rsquo;d mostly felt embarrassed by those feelings. I wanted to be calm, detached &mdash; a <a href="https://www.buzzfeed.com/annehelenpetersen/gone-girl-no-cool-girl">Cool Girl</a>, to reference <em>Gone Girl,</em> another best-selling book turned hit movie. Seeing Bella feel so many of the things I&rsquo;d felt was tremendously validating. I was normal! I&rsquo;m okay, you&rsquo;re okay, etc.</p>

<p>The fact that I watched the movie at 24 instead of 19 also meant that <em>Twilight</em> inspired a fair amount of nostalgia for me. By my mid-20s, I was no longer having those intense feelings anymore. I was turning into a much more practical, grounded person &mdash; realizing that I should be looking for stability, kindness, and shared values in the men I dated, rather than hotness or mysteriousness.</p>

<p>This was a necessary step in my maturation as a human being. (I&rsquo;m very glad to be married to my kind, stable husband, whom I met at church, rather than the hot guy in my algebra class who sometimes showered me with attention and sometimes ignored me.) But it came with a sense of loss &mdash; intense teenage feelings have a particular joy and drama to them.</p>

<p><em>Twilight</em> came at just the right moment for me to be a fan: I was close enough to my teenage years to appreciate the validation of my feelings, but far enough away that I could appreciate, rather than be embarrassed by, the romanticization of those feelings.</p>

<p>And that&rsquo;s why I never fully understood all the hand-wringing about whether <em>Twilight</em> was &ldquo;good&rdquo; for women, or whether Bella was a &ldquo;good role model&rdquo; for girls. Pop culture doesn&rsquo;t need to be instructive to be good. It can simply show people as they are, rather than as they should be. Bella isn&rsquo;t a character I want to be like as an adult, or want my daughters to be &mdash; but that&rsquo;s fine. Fiction for young people is full of spunky, plucky young women role models. It&rsquo;s okay for Bella to capture a particular way that many young women are &mdash; even if, with the benefit of a few years of hindsight, we recognize that&rsquo;s not the way we want to be forever.</p>

<p><strong>Alex: </strong>I mean, I understand the hand-wringing and analysis of whether Bella is a &ldquo;good role model&rdquo; because of <em>Twilight</em>&rsquo;s audience. The books were being consumed by teenage girls (and younger-than-teenage girls), and the natural response from adults, when it comes to <em>any</em> piece of culture as popular as <em>Twilight</em> was, is to fret over &ldquo;what is it teaching the children?&rdquo;</p>

<p>Many adults seem to believe that books for younger audiences should follow a certain moral code or provide some kind of moral guidance. Though overhauling the way we teach kids about books and how we approach books ourselves warrants its own entire article.</p>

<p>I read <em>New Moon</em> &mdash; the one where Bella wants to die so Edward will come and save her &mdash; and I&rsquo;ve seen every movie except<em> Breaking Dawn Part I</em>. I guess my main impression of that one book and the four movies (I don&rsquo;t want to speak for Stephenie Meyer&rsquo;s entire oeuvre) is that <em>Twilight</em> is both a not-so-well-written book and a mildly exciting movie franchise.</p>

<p>But like Constance said, it gets criticized exponentially harder than other pieces of pop culture because teenage girls like it. I think some of that criticism is warranted, in that the book wallows in shallow descriptions, but it gets magnified because of who its target audience is.</p>

<p>One of the things I wish the movies had done more of was lean into the vampire action. There wasn&rsquo;t enough vampire baseball. If you&rsquo;re gonna give these vampires magical superpowers &mdash; elemental manipulation, mind-reading, pain projection, etc. &mdash; then show us those powers. Make it seem cool to be a vampire. Or at least make it seem cooler to be an immortal high schooler than <em>Twilight</em> often did, with the characters just trolling around a Pacific Northwest high school looking for an eternal mate.</p>

<p><strong>Aja:</strong> We also can&rsquo;t really talk about whether <em>Twilight</em> was instructive or not without talking about the kinds of real-world legacies it left us with &mdash; including a full decade and counting of YA novels with extremely problematic relationships at their centers. Despite the many red flags flying around Bella and Edward&rsquo;s relationship &mdash; starting with their 87-year age difference, his stalking and controlling behavior, and the fact that he wants to bite her more than any other human he&rsquo;s ever met, fans loved the couple. And because plenty of <em>Twilight </em>fans were so interested in their codependent passion, publishers started marketing books that featured similar relationships as a selling point.</p>

<p>(One of the most <a href="https://www.dailydot.com/parsec/hush-hush-movie-rape-culture/">disturbing</a> of these books was <em>Hush, Hush</em>, a New York Times best-seller that featured a hero who literally stalks, threatens to sexually assault, and tries to kill the teen protagonist. It&rsquo;s a controversial book that&rsquo;s currently being <a href="https://variety.com/2018/film/news/supernatural-romance-hush-hush-movie-kellie-cyrus-1202879171/">made into a movie</a>, so the phenomenon is still very much with us.)</p>

<p>But we also have a whole generation of <em>Twilight</em> fans who turned the publishing industry on its head with their insistence and demand for trope-filled stories that indulged their fantasies. And their unashamed consumption of a brand of media that nakedly catered to them arguably presaged the <a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2018/8/29/17769168/romantic-comedies-crazy-rich-asians-all-the-boys-set-it-up">flourishing romantic comedy resurgence</a> we now appear to be in the middle of.</p>

<p><em>Twilight</em> fans were also responsible for one of the most remarkable and underdiscussed publishing phenomena in history, in that they essentially <a href="https://kernelmag.dailydot.com/issue-sections/features-issue-sections/10789/twilight-fandom-publishing-motu/">built an entire new publishing genre</a> from scratch. They started by creating a controversial but very effective system of <a href="https://fanlore.org/wiki/Filing_Off_The_Serial_Numbers">pull-to-publish</a> <em>Twilight</em> fanfiction &mdash; stories that centered on Bella and Edward analogues, without any copyrighted names or details. Then, backed by the money and enthusiasm of ravenous <em>Twilight</em> fans who wanted to read more, more, more, they created their own small-press publishing houses in order to ship those fics-turned-novels directly to their audiences.</p>

<p>It was from one of these <em>Twilight</em> fandom publishing houses, created for and by <em>Twilight</em> fans, that <em>Fifty Shades of Grey</em> &mdash; which was <a href="https://news.avclub.com/holy-crow-fifty-shades-of-grey-is-crazy-similar-to-its-1798276528">originally a massively popular <em>Twilight</em> fanfic</a> called &ldquo;Master of the Universe&rdquo; &mdash; originated. By blowing the doors wide open on the potential financial power of fanfiction, and introducing it to mainstream culture for the first time, <em>Fifty Shades of Grey </em>forever changed publishing. And it wouldn&rsquo;t have existed without this very specific way in which <em>Twilight</em> fans commercialized their fandom.</p>

<p>We could debate endlessly whether the marketing of any of these fics was &ldquo;good&rdquo; or &ldquo;morally instructive,&rdquo; but I do believe these fans were galvanized to do what they did because they were forced to spend years defending their hobby and their reading pleasures. And we all know the best way to defend your hobby is to find a way to make money from it.</p>

<p><strong>Constance: </strong>Aja brings up a great point here: <em>Twilight</em> was such a giant franchise that it had a real effect on pop culture. So what do you think is its most lasting legacy?</p>

<p>An interesting counterbalance to the wave of YA romances about creepy, mysterious, controlling boys that Aja correctly pegs to <em>Twilight</em>&rsquo;s popularity is that <em>Twilight</em> also fundamentally changed the way we talked about those romances. Before <em>Twilight</em>, they were considered silly and fun and not really worth critiquing, but the criticism of <em>Twilight</em> was so heated and so pointed that it ended up influencing the discourse around practically all relationships built on the Bella-Edward model.</p>

<p><a href="https://www.vox.com/culture/2017/3/10/14857542/buffy-the-vampire-slayer-explained-tv-influence"><em>Buffy the Vampire Slayer</em></a> is a lot more sophisticated about the power dynamics of its relationships than <em>Twilight</em> was, but I don&rsquo;t know that it could have gotten away with a ship like Buffy-Angel in a post-<em>Twilight</em> era. When <em>Buffy</em> first aired, a scene where Buffy wakes up in the middle of the night to find Angel sitting on her windowsill passed without comment, but after Edward Cullen, it became one of the scenes that people brought up when they talked about why they don&rsquo;t like that pairing. That&rsquo;s because one of the things the hand-wringing over <em>Twilight</em> established is that it is creepy when a boy breaks into a girl&rsquo;s bedroom to watch her sleep, the way Edward does with Bella.</p>

<p>And <em>The Vampire Diaries</em>, the <em>next</em> big vampire romance franchise after <em>Twilight</em>, went out of its way to subvert any <em>Twilight</em> comparisons with its central romance between Stefan and Elena. That show very pointedly played the big reveal that Stefan was a vampire in an echo of the famous <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujFUQwcAQ7w">&ldquo;Say it!&rdquo; / &ldquo;Vampire,&rdquo;</a> scene in <em>Twilight</em>, but in this version, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tkdzxVIIRiQ">Elena ran screaming in the other direction as soon as she realized what Stefan was</a>. There&rsquo;s even a scene in one episode where Elena is watching Stefan sleep, rather than the other way around, and he tells her it&rsquo;s creepy.</p>

<p>There&rsquo;s plenty for us to critique about the gender politics of <em>The Vampire Diaries</em>, but it&rsquo;s a show that clearly wanted to be the woke alternative to <em>Twilight</em>, and the way it positioned itself to take that slot was by subverting the tropes that the <em>Twilight</em> discourse had established were gross.</p>

<p><strong>Eleanor: </strong>The only love triangle YA story I really got into after <em>Twilight</em> was <em>The Hunger Games</em>, which provided an interesting (but also maddening) foil to <em>Twilight</em>. I saw <em>The Hunger Games</em> get treated a lot more seriously as a franchise because of its apparent critique of income inequality (the movie came out just months after Occupy Wall Street), and because Katniss was in so many ways the anti-Bella: tough, resourceful, independent. Also in <em>The Hunger Games</em>&rsquo; favor: Jennifer Lawrence, who played Katniss, was much, much better at the celebrity image game than Kristen Stewart.</p>

<p>But I found everything about <em>The Hunger Games</em> a little too perfect; the good role model protagonist and the &ldquo;serious&rdquo; commentary on today&rsquo;s social issues was all a bit much. I still appreciate <em>Twilight</em>&rsquo;s stubborn refusal to be anything more than what it was: an evocative, albeit problematic, teen love story that took its characters&rsquo; feelings seriously.</p>

<p>Would it be a stretch to call movies like <a href="https://www.vox.com/2015/11/13/9724852/brooklyn-movie-review"><em>Brooklyn</em></a><em> </em>and <a href="https://www.vox.com/2017/11/2/16552860/lady-bird-review-saoirse-ronan-greta-gerwig"><em>Lady Bird</em></a> part of the legacy of <em>Twilight? </em>Of course, they&rsquo;re in an entirely different genre; they&rsquo;re also more nuanced and better acted, and the relationships at their center are largely absent of the troubling power dynamics we discussed above. But they fill a place in my heart that <em>Twilight </em>once did, for the way they show that the stories of young women and their romantic choices are important and worthy of deep study.</p>

<p><strong>Alex:</strong> The world would be a better, kinder place if everyone was required to watch <em>Brooklyn</em>. Though I&rsquo;m not sure if it and <em>Lady Bird</em> are a part of <em>Twilight</em>&rsquo;s legacy or are simply terrific stories about teenage girls growing up that haven&rsquo;t been given the credit they&rsquo;re due.</p>

<p><em>Twilight</em>&rsquo;s more direct legacy is <em>Fifty Shades of Grey</em> and the phenomena &mdash; the backlash and the fandom &mdash; that followed it. Right? When <em>Fifty Shades</em> came out, article after article depicted and chided its readers as desperate, horny middle-aged women. The book was considered &ldquo;mommy porn.&rdquo;<strong> </strong>Like <em>Twilight</em>, <em>Fifty Shades</em> is no beautiful tome of language. But the criticism of it seemed amplified because women, particularly women of a certain age,  were really into it. And If there&rsquo;s one demographic whose taste people like to judge more than that of teenage girls, it has to be moms. Poor moms.</p>

<p><strong>Aja: </strong>I definitely think we can&rsquo;t discount the fact that a lot of the teen girls who got vilified for loving <em>Twilight</em> grew up and got vilified for loving New Adult erotica, so I&rsquo;m doubling down on the stance that <em>Twilight</em>&rsquo;s legacy is creating a generation of women who became loud and proud about their fictional kinks as a result of being perpetually shamed for them. I want to think that ultimately, this confidence outweighs all of <em>Twilight</em>&rsquo;s problematic tropes.</p>

<p>I will add that <em>Twilight</em> sparked a weird purity backlash in YA literature whereby <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/09/books/review/sex-young-adult-fiction.html">depictions of sex and sexuality between teens</a> became newly taboo, in part because of all the hand-wringing over <em>Twilight</em> and its ilk. I think that&rsquo;s taken a while to wear off, in part because <em>Twilight</em>&rsquo;s imprint was so indelible.</p>

<p>Also, there&rsquo;s one really obvious thing <em>Twilight</em> bequeathed us, simple but huge, and that&rsquo;s &ldquo;Team X&rdquo; and &ldquo;Team Y.&rdquo; Twilight made shipping, and discussion of shipping, a standard part of the pop culture discourse around media franchises, and it did so specifically via &ldquo;Team Edward&rdquo; and &ldquo;Team Jacob.&rdquo; (And the perennial underdog, Team Bella.) These ideas &mdash; and the specific concept of shipping as rooting for your pairing or character, or &ldquo;team,&rdquo; to win the love triangle &mdash; entered the pop culture landscape with <em>Twilight</em>, and now they&rsquo;re ubiquitous. And crucially, by framing shipping as a pastime akin to rooting for a sports team, they made shipping into something harmless and fun rather than yet another toxic, galling thing to shame fans for doing. If only for this, I am Team <em>Twilight</em> all the way.</p>
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			<entry>
			
			<author>
				<name>Eleanor Barkhorn</name>
			</author>
			
			<title type="html"><![CDATA[The case for a screen-free childhood]]></title>
			<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="https://www.vox.com/conversations/2017/4/17/15293898/technology-children-boundaries" />
			<id>https://www.vox.com/conversations/2017/4/17/15293898/technology-children-boundaries</id>
			<updated>2017-04-17T11:37:13-04:00</updated>
			<published>2017-04-17T08:00:02-04:00</published>
			<category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="archives" />
							<summary type="html"><![CDATA[Andy Crouch knows that he and his wife, Catherine, raised their kids in an unusual way. He calls it &#8220;radical.&#8221; They set strict boundaries around technology: no devices in the car. They can check their children&#8217;s devices at any time, for any reason. And before his children turned 10, they weren&#8217;t allowed to use screens [&#8230;]]]></summary>
			
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<p>Andy Crouch knows that he and his wife, Catherine, raised their kids in an unusual way. He calls it &ldquo;radical.&rdquo; They set strict boundaries around technology: no devices in the car. They can check their children&rsquo;s devices at any time, for any reason. And before his children turned 10, they weren&rsquo;t allowed to use screens at all.</p>

<p>The goal, according to Crouch, wasn&rsquo;t to deprive his kids of technology. Crouch is a self-proclaimed &ldquo;technophile&rdquo; who&rsquo;s owned nearly every gadget Apple has made. Instead, he and his wife wanted to give their family &ldquo;incredibly rich, embodied, fun experiences&rdquo; &mdash; the kinds of experiences you can&rsquo;t have behind a screen.</p>

<p>And his children, now teenagers, are thankful for the rules their parents set. &ldquo;Both of them say emphatically they would not have wanted it any other way,&rdquo; Crouch told me.</p>

<p><a href="http://andy-crouch.com/">Crouch</a>, a senior strategist at the John Templeton Foundation, wrote about his philosophy on technology and kids in his new book, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Tech-Wise-Family-Everyday-Putting-Technology/dp/0801018668"><em>The Tech-Wise Family: Everyday Steps for Putting Technology in Its Proper Place</em></a><em>. </em>I talked to him about the awkwardness of the &ldquo;no screens before age 10&rdquo; rule, and how his philosophy can apply to adults as well.</p>

<p>Our interview has been edited and condensed for clarity and length.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Eleanor Barkhorn</h3>
<p>I wasn&rsquo;t allowed to watch TV on the weeknights when I was a kid. My parents&rsquo; motivation was that they didn&rsquo;t want anything to distract me from my schoolwork &mdash; it was mostly about making sure I was doing well academically. Your motivation with your kids seems to be something different &mdash; more about formation of character.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Andy Crouch</h3>
<p>I think if I had to choose the word for it, it might be &ldquo;flourishing.&rdquo;</p>

<p>Like, what is a very good life? What&#8217;s a great childhood? It&#8217;s a childhood that has these multisensory experiences of encountering the wonder of the world in other people and helps develop resilience and develop creativity, and it&#8217;s the kind of upbringing that if you have it, you&#8217;ll never be bored because you&#8217;ve developed strategies for discovering wonder and interest wherever you are.</p>

<p>We really believed and believe &mdash; there&#8217;s a lot of research based on this &mdash; children in their early years, they are so primed to learn. They are so primed to explore. They are primed to do that in an incredibly embodied way, which is why they are so much more active than we adults are. They are just so wired to be physical, and we really didn&#8217;t want<strong> </strong>our kids&#8217; experience and learning to be reduced to something that was minimally physical and mostly mental.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Eleanor Barkhorn</h3>
<p>The downside, though, is that rules like this can be difficult for kids socially &mdash; if there&#8217;s an app all the kids at school are playing and your kid is the one who doesn&#8217;t know anything about it and can&#8217;t relate to his peers.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Andy Crouch</h3>
<p>This has absolutely been an issue for our own children in that there are awkward moments when kids at school talk about television shows that my kids don&#8217;t watch because our family to this day really does not watch any television. There are all kinds of moments when they become aware that they are missing out on something that&#8217;s important to their peers.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Eleanor Barkhorn</h3>
<p>You talk in the book about the awkwardness of your son&#8217;s play dates when kids would come over and they realized you didn&#8217;t have video games.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Andy Crouch</h3>
<p>As near as I can tell, elementary school boys don&#8217;t know anything to do together except play video games. My son&#8217;s classmates just did not want to come to his house because they did not know what to do. I don&#8217;t think it was too strong to say it was painful to watch the occasional friend of his who would come over and how poorly it went most times, how bored those boys were, how little engaged they were and how my son felt that on behalf of his friends and didn&#8217;t quite know what to do to help. That was not easy.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Eleanor Barkhorn</h3>
<p>How did you help your kids navigate that tension?</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Andy Crouch</h3>
<p>Our job as parents is to have the long view because children don&#8217;t.</p>

<p>Most of this stuff is very evanescent. An app that&#8217;s really big today is gone in a year. Club Penguin or whatever it is now that&#8217;s a really big deal for 18 months and then kids are on to other things, because ultimately these entertaining and even social kind of engagements, they are pretty thin. I think all kids recognize that, not just kids who are parented in this relatively radical way, and so they tire of them. This is why our homes are filled with plastic toys and electronic toys that none of the kids play with anymore because they&#8217;re not really that satisfying for anyone.</p>

<p>So as long as you can wait it out like for 12 months &mdash; which of course feels like a really long time in the life of a child, but it passes so quickly. Even whatever the television show that you don&#8217;t know that much about or only vaguely know the names of the characters or the plot points, those things come and go pretty quickly.</p>

<p>The other thing I would say, though, is it cannot be all about what you&#8217;ve taken away. It has to be about what you put in its place. For every moment of awkwardly realizing we missed out on something, our children had so many other moments of being part of these incredibly rich, embodied, fun experiences, whether it was out of doors or my father this time of year is boiling maple syrup at my parents&#8217; home at Amherst, Massachusetts, and spending weekends doing that and smelling the syrup, collecting the sap in the snowy or muddy woods, whichever it is.</p>

<p>When your life is full of things like that, the thin things that you&#8217;re missing are somewhat less crucial, I think.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Eleanor Barkhorn</h3>
<p>Your children are teenagers now. How do they feel about the &ldquo;no screens before 10&rdquo; policy these days, with a bit of distance?</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Andy Crouch</h3>
<p>Both of them say emphatically they would not have wanted it any other way. They feel like they were given a much richer set of experiences and richer relationships with other kids who weren&#8217;t as dependent on those things, and that their lives were full in a way that they don&#8217;t see in a lot of their classmates and peers.</p>

<p>You don&#8217;t get many moments of triumph in parenting, but one of them was when our kids were probably 15 and 12 or 14 and 11. We were driving somewhere and they were talking in the back seat, and they somehow got to talking about these very odd choices we made when they were young about limiting screens and video games in particular. Timothy said to his sister &mdash; this is a 14-year-old talking to his younger sister &mdash; &#8220;Yeah, Amy, it&#8217;s hard at the time, but our parents aren&#8217;t like other parents. They&#8217;re actually intentional about what&#8217;s good for us.&#8221;</p>

<p>And she&#8217;s like, &#8220;Yeah, and in the long run, it&#8217;s really better because there&#8217;s more satisfying things to do.&#8221;</p>

<p>Overhearing your children kind of processing what their single-digit years were like at that slightly older stage is just one of the happiest things that could happen as a parent.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Eleanor Barkhorn</h3>
<p>Hanna Rosin wrote <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2013/04/the-touch-screen-generation/309250/">a cover story for the Atlantic</a> in 2013 about toddlers and iPads. She came to the conclusion that if you give your toddler an iPad, at first they&#8217;ll be obsessed and use it all the time. But then they&#8217;ll learn it&#8217;s a toy just like anything else and drop it behind the couch and forget about it.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Andy Crouch</h3>
<p>That&#8217;s sort of the desensitization theory that they&#8217;ll indulge and then get tired of it or maybe sick of it. There may be some truth to that.</p>

<p>I will tell you one thing in the original research that we did for this book: When you ask teenagers the thing they would most like to change about their relationship with their parents, &ldquo;I wish my parents were not on their screens and would have paid attention to me or were not on their device and would have paid attention to me.&rdquo;</p>

<p>What this suggests to me is that we adults haven&#8217;t done a very good job of getting desensitized enough. We&#8217;ve got access to these things, and we haven&#8217;t thrown them behind the couch. We&#8217;re really stuck. We are overly dependent on those sort of intermittent reinforcements that these devices give us, and our kids know it. The kids are very dissatisfied with this and don&#8217;t want that to be the case for their parents.</p>

<p>If it&#8217;s not working for us adults, why do we think it&#8217;s going to work for the toddler? That would be my pushback to that line of thought.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Eleanor Barkhorn</h3>
<p>In our office we use the app Slack, and people feel a lot of anxiety about it. They feel like they want to stop checking it all the time, but they&rsquo;re afraid of missing out on important things if they step away even for a few hours. How do we have a proper relationship with Slack? Do you have advice for a &ldquo;tech-wise office&rdquo;? &nbsp;</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Andy Crouch</h3>
<p>I worked at Christianity Today magazine, and we did a lot of collaboration on Slack like a lot of media companies do. We had all the same challenges, maybe only slightly better because we&#8217;re a little bit smaller of a team than a Vox team is.</p>

<p>We&#8217;re all discovering with all these technologies that the promise of scale is deceptive. This happened first with email. The promise is, among other things, scale and speed at very low friction: that is, lots of people can reach me and I can reach lots of people very quickly and very easily. That sounds like a wonderful promise.</p>

<p>The Slack version of that would be [that] the whole office can listen in and participate in conversations about what&#8217;s going on and what stories are developing, and it&#8217;ll be so easy. So it turns out that&#8217;s all true. But what comes with that is just a deluge of information and a kind of constant drip of reinforcement for my need for novelty that is actually the enemy of real creativity.</p>

<p>Real creativity requires small-scale focusing, attending to a relatively small domain. It requires doing it slowly, which is to say to be really creative, I have to have enough time to patiently work through the difficulty in a particular domain or with a particular idea. Real creativity comes with a certain amount of resistance. Real creative work pushes back against something.</p>

<p>Of course, we&#8217;ve done everything we can to get rid of all this resistance. All the more so with communication. The best moments of human communication are with a few people at length really listening to each other. Now the thing is, our brains do not like this. We love novelty. We love that stimulation of that notification arriving. I&#8217;m getting notifications right now of Outlook messages coming in and my brain is like, &ldquo;Ooh, something new, I&#8217;m getting a little tired talking to Eleanor and someone else wants to talk to me.&rdquo;</p>

<p>And that is such a powerful, deeply rooted [idea] in our evolutionary history, that drive for changing focus, for novelty, for new stimulation that it makes it almost impossible to do deep, creative work.</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Eleanor Barkhorn</h3>
<p>So what&rsquo;s the solution?</p>
<h3 class="wp-block-heading">Andy Crouch</h3>
<p>Often the answer is some kind of Sabbath, which is a routine of disengagement, whether it&#8217;s an hour a day or at minimum or a day a week or whatever. Maybe in a workspace where a lot of the work is creative, the wisdom would be half the day or three-quarters of the day.</p>

<p>So I would try to attend to my email only two times a day, in the morning at the beginning of the day and at the end. The middle of the day is for much thicker, deeper forms of collaboration than these friction-free tools actually make possible.</p>

<p><strong>Correction</strong>: This article has been corrected to reflect that Crouch&rsquo;s parents live in Amherst, Massachusetts.</p>
						]]>
									</content>
			
					</entry>
			<entry>
			
			<author>
				<name>Eleanor Barkhorn</name>
			</author>
			
			<title type="html"><![CDATA[Rio closing ceremony: So you won an Olympic medal. Now what?]]></title>
			<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="https://www.vox.com/2016/8/21/12573972/rio-olympics-2016-closing-ceremony" />
			<id>https://www.vox.com/2016/8/21/12573972/rio-olympics-2016-closing-ceremony</id>
			<updated>2016-08-21T15:04:32-04:00</updated>
			<published>2016-08-21T19:00:03-04:00</published>
			<category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Culture" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Sports" />
							<summary type="html"><![CDATA[The Rio Olympics officially ended on Sunday, with the closing ceremony in Maracan&#227; Stadium. For the 11,000 athletes who participated in the Rio Games, the closing ceremony marks the end of an intense two weeks of competition and the media attention that comes with it. Now they return to their lives away from the spotlight [&#8230;]]]></summary>
			
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<img alt="" data-caption="" data-portal-copyright="Anna Harris" data-has-syndication-rights="1" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/6972269/DSC_5927.jpg?quality=90&#038;strip=all&#038;crop=0,0,100,100" />
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<p>The <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/6/27/12044810/rio-2016-summer-olympics">Rio Olympics</a> officially ended on Sunday, with the <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/8/19/12502888/closing-ceremony-time-rio-olympics-watch-online-time-live-stream/in/11808851">closing ceremony</a> in Maracan&atilde; Stadium. For the 11,000 athletes who participated in the Rio Games, the closing ceremony marks the end of an intense two weeks of competition and the media attention that comes with it.</p>

<p>Now they return to their lives away from the spotlight &mdash; either to eventually begin training for the Tokyo Games in 2020, or, for athletes who are retiring, to find a new career path.</p>

<p>What is it like to go home after the intensity of the Olympics? <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/7/13/12046050/life-after-the-olympics">We spoke to eight Olympians</a> about that very question. Here&rsquo;s what they told us.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">1) The sting of defeat is especially strong when it’s your last Olympics</h2>
<p>When runner <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/7/13/12077672/olympics-jim-ryun-track">Jim Ryun</a> tripped and fell in a qualifying race during the 1972 Munich Olympics, he appealed to the officials to reinstate him so he could run in the finals. Their response? &#8220;It&#8217;s unfortunate what happened to you. Why don&#8217;t you come back in four years and try again?&#8221;</p>

<p>But Ryun couldn&rsquo;t just come back in four years &mdash; he&rsquo;d already decided that Munich would be his final Olympics: &#8220;I didn&rsquo;t want to put my family through the pressure  of having to hold a real job in addition to training all those hours. I wasn&#8217;t going to do that.&#8221;</p>

<p>So he had to live with the fact that at his last Olympics, he didn&rsquo;t even get a chance to compete for gold.</p>

<p>For softball player <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/7/13/12067548/olympics-jennie-finch">Jennie Finch</a>, the 2008 Beijing Games were her last Olympics &mdash; but not by choice. The International Olympic Committee had voted to discontinue softball and baseball. So when the US team won silver (the first time in team history that it didn&rsquo;t win gold), Finch was devastated.</p>

<p>&#8220;To this day, every time I bring out the silver medal, it still stings,&#8221; she said.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">2) Your mistakes haunt you long after the Olympics are over</h2>
<p><a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/7/13/12067592/nick-delpopolo-pot-brownie-olympics">Nick Delpopolo</a>, a judoka, failed a drug test at the 2012 Olympics after he ate a pot-laced brownie at a going away party. He had to leave London early, and was faced with a barrage of mocking press coverage, including a column in his home state newspaper that said, &#8220;He&rsquo;ll always be known as the guy who flunked the drug test for pot brownies.&#8221;</p>

<p>Even after the media attention died down, some of his friends and acquaintances wouldn&rsquo;t let it go:</p>
<blockquote class="wp-block-quote has-text-align-none is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow">
<p>I lost many sponsors. One was a local athletic club run by people I&rsquo;d known almost my whole life. Friends, foes, and internet trolls jeered at me for my stupidity. Fellow judokas spread false rumors about me. One even said they saw me doing hard drugs &mdash; crystal meth or heroin &mdash; at a party. I was frustrated. How did naysayers have the right to take one mistake and spin it into a bigger lie, a smear campaign?</p>
</blockquote><h2 class="wp-block-heading">3) Speaking out on controversial issues is risky for Olympic athletes — but worth it</h2>
<p>Runner <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/7/13/12118332/john-carlos-olympics">John Carlos</a> raised his fist in protest on the medals podium at the 1968 Mexico City Olympics, and paid dearly for it in the days and years that followed. He and Tommie Smith, who also raised his fist, were suspended from the US Olympic team and had to leave Mexico City.</p>

<p>It only got worse from there:</p>
<blockquote class="wp-block-quote has-text-align-none is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow">
<p>A lot of people walked away from me. They weren&#8217;t walking away because they didn&#8217;t have love for me or they had disdain for me. They were walking away because they were afraid. What they saw happening to me, they didn&#8217;t want it to happen to them and theirs.</p>

<p>My wife and kids were tormented. I was strong enough to deal with whatever people threw at me, because this is the life I&#8217;d signed up for. But not my family. My marriage crumbled. I got divorced. It was like the Terminator coming and shooting one of his ray guns through my suit of armor.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Four-time gold medal-winning diver <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/7/13/12067614/greg-louganis-olympics">Greg Louganis</a> faced condemnation after he told the world he was gay and HIV-positive.</p>
<blockquote class="wp-block-quote has-text-align-none is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow">
<p>I went into my press tour wanting to debunk myths about gay people with HIV. Instead, my goals were deflected by commentators who focused on a bad dive at the 1988 Olympics, when I hit the 3-meter springboard, cutting my head open; the wound was treated by a physician, and we didn&rsquo;t have latex gloves on site in those days. My decision to hide my diagnosis after my injury was called <a href="http://articles.baltimoresun.com/1995-03-01/sports/1995060179_1_greg-louganis-ebola-hiv"><strong>&#8220;indefensible&#8221;</strong></a> and <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/sports/1995/02/24/doctor-says-he-treated-louganis-without-gloves-because-of-time/de765b3b-31fe-4896-8336-e13b8ce3c57e/"><strong>&#8220;morally inept.&#8221;</strong></a></p>
</blockquote>
<p>After years of ostracism from fans and the public at large, both Carlos and Louganis say that the difficulties were worth it. Carlos believes that with so much injustice in the world, people with a public platform must speak out against it.</p>

<p>&#8220;If you&#8217;re famous and you&#8217;re black, you have to be an activist,&#8221; he said.</p>

<p>Louganis says that he is gratified to know that his story has inspired other athletes:</p>
<blockquote class="wp-block-quote has-text-align-none is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow">
<p>Fellow Olympian Ji Wallace, who is gay and HIV-positive, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vfn3mV3YPvQ"><strong>mentioned</strong></a> he went public with his diagnosis after watching one of my interviews with Piers Morgan during the London Olympics. I simply said that HIV doesn&rsquo;t take over my entire life. It&rsquo;s just a small part of who I am. I was blown away that my life could give strength to others after all these years.</p>
</blockquote><h2 class="wp-block-heading">4) Winning gold in one Olympics isn’t a guarantee you’ll make the team for the next Olympics</h2>
<p><a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/7/13/12101942/natasha-kai-olympics-soccer">Natasha Kai</a> was a key player on the gold medal-winning United States women&rsquo;s soccer team at the 2008 Beijing Games. But by the 2012 London Games, she was off the national team: &#8220;Soccer is a brutally competitive sport. Your place on the national team is always precarious; it&#8217;s like every day is a new tryout.&#8221;</p>

<p>Injuries can also turn the next Olympics from a certainty into an impossibility. After winning silver at the 2004 Athens Games, swimmer <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/7/13/12099858/olympics-job-maritza-mcclendon">Maritza McClendon</a> was sure she would be competing for gold in Beijing. But a double shoulder injury dashed those plans. &#8220;I retired, not wanting to be that athlete who strained her body past her prime,&#8221; she said.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">5) Finding a new career after the Olympics can be a hustle</h2>
<p><a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/7/13/12067560/olympics-donna-devarona-swimming">Donna de Varona</a> had won two gold medals in swimming by the time she was 17. But she still couldn&rsquo;t get a scholarship to swim in college. This was 1964, before Title IX. So de Varona retired from swimming &mdash; and then had to figure out what to do with the rest of her life.</p>

<p>She decided to talk her way into a job at ABC Sports:</p>
<blockquote class="wp-block-quote has-text-align-none is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow">
<p>When I started thinking about my post-Olympics future, I picked up the phone and called ABC producer Chuck Howard. I said, &#8220;I really can&rsquo;t imagine quitting my sport, but if you let me work as an expert it would make this decision easier.&#8221;</p>

<p>A few months later, at the age of 17, I became the youngest commentator on sports television, and one of the first women to hold that position.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Fellow swimmer <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/7/13/12099858/olympics-job-maritza-mcclendon">McClendon</a> had a harder time finding work after her final Olympics. After Athens, she retired and was faced with the task of finding her first job &mdash; at the age of 26.</p>
<blockquote class="wp-block-quote has-text-align-none is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow">
<p>As a full-time swimmer for more than five years, I&rsquo;d had no time to take up an odd job during summer breaks. The most intimidating part of entering the real world was putting together a r&eacute;sum&eacute;. How could I impress employers with zero bullet points? Sure, people are impressed by Olympic athletes. But waving an Olympic medal in front of the human resources receptionist doesn&rsquo;t mean you can skip over the experience section on job applications.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>It took her a full year to find a job.</p>
<hr class="wp-block-separator" /><h2 class="wp-block-heading">Watch: Women led the way for Team USA</h2><div class="p-scalable-video"><iframe frameborder="0" src="https://goo.gl/RZz1a0" height="315" width="560"></iframe></div>
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			<entry>
			
			<author>
				<name>Eleanor Barkhorn</name>
			</author>
			
			<title type="html"><![CDATA[How dads improve their kids&#8217; lives, according to science]]></title>
			<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="https://www.vox.com/2014/6/14/5804858/how-dads-improve-their-kids-lives-according-to-science" />
			<id>https://www.vox.com/2014/6/14/5804858/how-dads-improve-their-kids-lives-according-to-science</id>
			<updated>2018-09-14T14:28:37-04:00</updated>
			<published>2016-06-17T09:02:00-04:00</published>
			<category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Features" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Science" />
							<summary type="html"><![CDATA[story,interview When Paul Raeburn became a father for the first time, he had one piece of advice to go on. &#8220;The most important things to do,&#8221; a colleague told him, are &#8220;to tell your kids you love them and to spend time with them.&#8221; Several years later, he remarried, had a second set of kids, [&#8230;]]]></summary>
			
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<div class="chorus-snippet center"> <p><!-- ######## BEGIN SNIPPET ######## --></p> <div class="chorus-snippet"> <p>story,interview</p> <p class="s-ecnt-intro">When <a target="_blank" href="http://www.paulraeburn.com/" rel="noopener">Paul Raeburn</a> became a father for the first time, he had one piece of advice to go on. &#8220;The most important things to do,&#8221; a colleague told him, are &#8220;to tell your kids you love them and to spend time with them.&#8221; Several years later, he remarried, had a second set of kids, and was determined to learn more about fatherhood than the basic guidelines he&#8217;d followed the first time around.</p> <p>&#8220;We all think we know a lot about fathers and what they do for their kids, but what do we really know?&#8221; he told me in an interview.</p> <p>A science writer who&#8217;d published books on <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Acquainted-Night-Understand-Depression-Disorder/dp/0767914384">mental illness</a> and <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Mars-Uncovering-Secrets-National-Geographic/dp/B0042P5HVQ">space exploration</a>, Raeburn did a comprehensive survey of scientific research on fatherhood. The result is his book <em><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Do-Fathers-Matter-Science-Overlooked/dp/0374141045">Do Fathers Matter?</a>.</em> Raeburn found that fathers play a huge role in their children&#8217;s lives, even before they&#8217;re born.</p> <p>&#8220;Fathers have much more effect on children than even I would have guessed &mdash; and I was biased in favor of fathers to start with,&#8221; he said.</p> <p>Raeburn also had to confront the dark flipside of a father&#8217;s influence on his kids: what happens when he&#8217;s not involved in their lives. The problem of disengaged dads is real, and there isn&#8217;t a clear solution for how to fix it.</p> <h3>Fathers offer tremendous benefits to their children</h3> <p><em>Do Fathers Matter? </em>is structured as a timeline of a child&#8217;s life. Early chapters address conception and pregnancy, and then the book journeys through infancy, early childhood, and adolescence. For each stage of development, Raeburn describes how a father contributes.</p> <p>In pregnancy, genes passed along by the father <a href="http://dash.harvard.edu/bitstream/handle/1/3153297/Haig_GeneticConflictHUmanPregnancy.pdf?sequence=2">help a fetus</a> draw in more nutrients from its mother. These genes allow the fetus to release hormones that elevate its mother&#8217;s blood pressure, increasing the amount of blood that goes to the fetus, and to raise its mother&#8217;s blood sugar so more sugar-rich blood goes through the placenta.</p> <p>&#8220;The fetus is not just passively receiving nutrients from its mother,&#8221; he said. &#8220;It&#8217;s actually sending out control signals, and it got that ability from genes that it got from its father.&#8221;</p> <p><span>After the child is born, the father&#8217;s presence &mdash; not only his genes &mdash; matters. Raeburn </span><a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21057648">cites research</a><span> from Nadya Panscofar of the the College of New Jersey and Lynne Vernon-Feagans of the University of North Carolina. They found that fathers have a greater impact than mothers in expanding their children&#8217;s vocabulary.</span></p> <p>&#8220;What they think is going on there is that families where mothers spend more time with their kids, they&#8217;re much more attuned to the kids&#8217; language,&#8221; he said. &#8220;So they don&#8217;t use words that the kids don&#8217;t know as often. Fathers, who might spend less time, are more likely to use many more words, and that stretches kids.&#8221;</p> <q>&#8220;I&#8217;m glad to know my involvement is a good thing. But that&#8217;s not why I spend time with my kids. I do it because I like it.&#8221;</q><p>And then comes adolescence. One of the more striking findings described in the book shows how good fathers help their daughters transition from childhood to adulthood. Girls whose fathers are absent or almost always absent go through puberty sooner than their peers whose fathers are present.</p> <p>The book discusses research by University of Arizona&#8217;s Bruce J. Ellis, who first established this connection, and has since attempted to find out why it happens. Is it genetic or environmental? Ellis answered this question by <a href="http://cals.arizona.edu/fcs/sites/cals.arizona.edu.fcs/files/DP%20Tither_Ellis%202008.pdf">studying families with two daughters</a>, some with divorced parents and some with parents who remained married. He found that younger sisters in divorced families with badly behaved fathers &mdash; in other words, girls who&#8217;d spent more time without their father present &mdash; got their first periods about a year earlier than their older sisters.</p> <p>&#8220;The conclusion was that growing up with an emotionally or physically distant father in early to middle childhood could be a &lsquo;key life transition&#8217; that alters sexual development,&#8221; Raeburn wrote.</p> <p>Raeburn also highlights the crucial role that involved fathers play throughout their kids&#8217; lives: financial support. For a long time, of course, this was considered the primary &mdash; if not the only &mdash; benefit that children got from their fathers. We now know that fathers help meet their children&#8217;s emotional and social needs as well as their material needs. And mothers are increasingly likely to be partial or even <a href="http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2013/05/29/breadwinner-moms/">primary breadwinners</a> in their families. But Raeburn cautions against losing sight of the importance of a father&#8217;s contribution to his children&#8217;s financial well-being.</p> <p>&#8220;Poverty is without question the worst thing that can happen to children,&#8221; he said. &#8220;We shouldn&#8217;t shortchange the father who works 50 hours a week to support his family and takes on extra shifts. That person may not be the wonderful father who makes every school field trip that we might think is an ideal. But he&#8217;s doing something very important for his children.&#8221;</p> <div class="chorus-snippet m-fishtank no-responsive-video"></div> <!-- ######## END SNIPPET ######## --> <!-- ######## END SNIPPET ######## --><p><br>Probably my favorite passage in <em>Do Fathers Matter? </em>comes when Raeburn steps back for a moment from his impressive research review to reflect on why he wants to be around his children. It&#8217;s not because he wants to boost their IQs or keep their hormones in check. It&#8217;s because he loves his children and enjoys being with them.</p> <p>&#8220;I&#8217;m glad to know my involvement is a good thing,&#8221; he wrote. &#8220;But that&#8217;s not why I spend time with my kids. I do it because I like it.&#8221;</p> <p>Raeburn is not alone: fathers are spending more and more time with their children.</p> <p>&#8220;In 1965, fathers spent on average two and a half hours a week with their children,&#8221; Raeburn <a href="http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2013/06/11/5-facts-about-fathers/">said</a>. &#8220;In more recent polling and surveys, they report spending 7.3 hours with their children. Fathers spend a lot more time with their children than they once did.&#8221;</p> <h3>But a large number of children do not experience these benefits</h3> <p>Even as some fathers are spending more time with their children than they did a half-century ago, other fathers becoming less involved. More than a quarter of children in America live apart from their fathers, up from 11 percent in 1960. And of those fathers who don&#8217;t live with their children, between a third and a half never or almost never see their children. A Pew report from 2011 called these diverging patterns &#8220;<a href="http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2011/06/15/a-tale-of-two-fathers/">a tale of two fathers</a>.&#8221;</p> <p>&#8220;The extent of the problem is larger than I would have expected,&#8221; Raeburn said.</p> <p>And it&#8217;s a problem that he, as a divorced father, can empathize with.</p> <p>&#8220;Having been divorced myself, there were times when my relationships with my children were very tenuous,&#8221; he said. &#8220;It&#8217;s very sad that it happens so frequently.&#8221;</p> <p>A father&#8217;s absence can have lasting negative repercussions. <em>Do Fathers Matter? </em>includes a list of the consequences of absent fathers, provided by<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Life-Without-Father-Compelling-Indispensable/dp/0684822970"> Rutgers University&#8217;s David Popenoe</a>: juvenile delinquency, teen pregnancy, lower academic achievement, depression, substance abuse, and poverty.</p> <h3>So what do you do if your father&#8217;s not around?</h3> <p>Nevertheless, Raeburn emphasizes that while fathers are important, they are not essential. He points to two of the most prominent Americans who grew up with absent fathers: President Barack Obama and former President Bill Clinton. Clearly, an involved father is not a prerequisite for a rich, successful life. And, of course, a father who is present but abusive can have a disastrous effect on his children. <span>Children and the parents who raise them are individuals, not statistics, and what is true in the aggregate is not necessarily true of a specific family under a specific set of circumstances.</span></p> <p>Over the past few years many single mothers have written passionately about the ways their children thrive in their nontraditional &mdash; though no longer unusual &mdash; family structure. In the New York Times, Katie Roiphe <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2012/08/12/opinion/sunday/in-defense-of-single-motherhood.html?pagewanted=all">celebrated</a> her household for being &#8220;messy, bohemian, warm.&#8221; Last year in Slate, single mother Pamela Gwyn Kripke <a href="http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2013/01/single_moms_are_better_kids_raised_by_single_mothers_are_sturdier.html">argued</a> that her children are tougher and more resilient as a result of being raised in a one-parent family. Stacia L. Brown, who founded an online community for single mothers of color called <a href="http://beyondbabymamas.com/">Beyond Baby Mamas</a>, <a href="http://www.theatlantic.com/sexes/archive/2013/03/how-unwed-mothers-feel-about-being-unwed-mothers/274301/">has written</a> about the many reasons different women raise children on their own &mdash; and all these reasons focus on what&#8217;s best for their kids.</p> <p>Raeburn describes a conversation he had with a friend who is a single mom. Upon hearing that he was writing a book about fathers, she asked him, &#8220;What do I need to know?&#8221;</p> <q>&#8220;We can talk about fathers and social policies and political issues, on a basis of what we really know, not on a basis of how we think fathers behave&#8221;</q><p>&#8220;That&#8217;s the kind of reaction that I hope people will have,&#8221; he said. &#8220;Some researchers have suggested for example that single mothers try to involve a male father figure with their children. It may be a brother or uncle or you know somebody in the family. It could be a male figure that spends a lot of time with the kids &mdash; it could be a close friend. That&#8217;s not always possible. But it&#8217;s one good piece of advice for single mothers.&#8221;</p> <p>He also points back to the language study that showed fathers help expand their children&#8217;s vocabulary.</p> <p>&#8220;That doesn&#8217;t mean that in families where kids don&#8217;t have a father that kids won&#8217;t learn to talk,&#8221; he said. &#8220;But it does suggest to single mothers that they might want to be a little more conscious of that and push their children a little more to encourage that kind of language development.&#8221;</p> <h3>Are there policies that could help encourage dads to be more involved in their kids&#8217; lives?</h3> <p>One of Raeburn&#8217;s goals in writing <em>Do Fathers Matter? </em>was to inspire a more informed policy conversation about fatherhood.</p> <p>&#8220;What I&#8217;ve tried to do here is collect a lot of the new and recent research that says, &lsquo;Here&#8217;s what fathers really do for their children,'&#8221; he said. &#8220;And once we know that, then we can talk about all the things we want to say about fathers and social policies and political issues and everything, on a basis of what we really know, not on a basis of how we think fathers behave.&#8221;</p> <p>The book doesn&#8217;t include many policy recommendations, but Raeburn can think of one that he believes is vitally important: a strong family leave policy.</p> <p>&#8220;There are <a href="http://qz.com/167163/countries-without-paid-maternity-leave-swaziland-lesotho-papua-new-guinea-and-the-united-states-of-america/">four countries in the world</a> that do not require parental leave, and the US is one of them,&#8221; he said. &#8220;Parental leave starts things off on the right foot, and it&#8217;s crazy that we don&#8217;t do that.&#8221;</p> <p>But parental leave, as crucial as it is, would only help already-engaged dads become even more engaged. It wouldn&#8217;t affect dads who have no interest in their kids, or dads who are in prison, or dads who have such a troubled relationship with their ex-wives or ex-girlfriends that they never see their children.</p> <p>Reducing the number of children who grow up without their fathers would require a whole host of changes: a stronger jobs market for men with lower education levels; a rethinking of the child-support system, which in its current form <a href="http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2014/02/how-anti-poverty-programs-marginalize-fathers/283984/">often drives fathers away</a> from their children; well-designed mentorship and <a href="http://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2014/02/how-schools-can-give-men-the-skills-they-need-to-be-good-dads/283983/">apprenticeship programs</a>; prison reform.</p> <p>And all this addresses only the practical obstacles that prevent many men from being present fathers. There&#8217;s also widespread emotional healing that needs to take place. <span>Children of divorce are </span><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Understanding-Divorce-Cycle-Children-Marriages/dp/0521616603">more likely</a><span> </span><span>to grow up to have relational challenges as adults.</span><span> </span><span>Many of today&#8217;s absent fathers were themselves let down by their dads. For them, committing to fatherhood means committing to a job they&#8217;ve seen done really badly in the past. And that is deeply, deeply, challenging.</span></p> <p>Perhaps Raeburn&#8217;s book can have some part in this emotional work &mdash; in convincing men that they do have a role to play, even if their own fathers weren&#8217;t perfect.</p> <p>&#8220;There are differences in the way mothers and fathers parent, and that&#8217;s a good thing,&#8221; Raeburn said. &#8220;We can use that to raise happy and healthy children. It&#8217;s actually a pretty good biological system.&#8221;</p> <div class="question"><p><em class="name">Eleanor Barkhorn:</em> Lots of people have written books about fathers: Michael Lewis, Bill Cosby, Barack Obama, to name just a few. What makes your book distinctive?</p></div> <div class="answer"><p><em class="name">Paul Raeburn:</em>There have been thousands of books written by fathers about how wonderful their children are. And there have been many books written by children about how wonderful their fathers are. And all those things are good. I think my kids are the greatest kids in the world, too, just like most parents do. But I didn&#8217;t think we needed another book like that. I wanted to step around all those books and say, &#8220;yes we all think we know a lot about fathers and what they do for their kids, but what do we really know based on scientific research?&#8221; So what I&#8217;ve tried to do here is collect a lot of the new and recent research that says, &#8220;Here&#8217;s what fathers really do for their children.&#8221; And once we know that, then we can talk about all the things we want to say about fathers and social policies and political issues and everything, on a basis of what we really know, not on a basis of how we think fathers behave.</p></div> <div class="question"><p><em class="name">Eleanor Barkhorn:</em> What&#8217;s an example of something you learned about how fathers contribute to their children&#8217;s lives?</p></div> <div class="answer"> <p><em class="name">Paul Raeburn</em> In general fathers have much more effect on children than even I would have guessed &mdash; and I was biased in favor of fathers to start with. It turns out that fathers have all kinds of effects on their children, and children have all kinds of effects on their fathers. Some of what&#8217;s interesting is what happens during pregnancy, for example.</p> <p>Men&#8217;s testosterone levels drop when their partners are pregnant. Our hormonal systems are fundamental parts of our biology. They&#8217;re not easily tinkered with. So the fact that a man&#8217;s testosterone drops during his partner&#8217;s pregnancy is quite interesting. It&#8217;s surprising. And it happens with no physical connection to the child. There&#8217;s a physical connection to the partner, but not in a way that would obviously affect hormones. So not only does testosterone fall, but prolactin in men rises. And if you&#8217;ve heard of prolactin at all, it&#8217;s because we associate prolactin with nursing. Why it would rise in fathers during pregnancy is a mystery. But the thinking is, these hormonal changes in fathers during pregnancy change men from competitors seeking mates into more nurturing individuals ready to raise a child. Now the science is, the hormones change. The speculation is, it happens because it&#8217;s changing men into more nurturing figures for their children. The reason I&#8217;m making that point is, I&#8217;m trying to be very careful about what we know and what we don&#8217;t know. There&#8217;s interesting speculation associated with these things.</p> <p>Another interesting example: we know a father&#8217;s genes contribute to hair color and eye color and maybe how tall or short their children are, and all those obvious things. It also turns out that genes from fathers also give the developing fetus the ability to control the mother&#8217;s blood pressure, control her blood sugar levels, and to control its own growth. And so the fetus is not just passively receiving nutrients from its mother. It&#8217;s actually sending out control signals, and it got that ability from genes that it got from its father.</p> </div> <div class="question"><p><em class="name">Eleanor Barkhorn:</em> What about after the child is born? What sort of a role do fathers play?</p></div> <div class="answer"><p><em class="name">Paul Raeburn:</em> The amount that fathers spend with their children has tripled since the 1960s. In 1965, fathers spent on average two and a half hours a week with their children. In more recent polling and surveys, they report spending 7.3 hours with their children. So fathers spend a lot more time with their children than they did. It&#8217;s also true that if you add up the total amount of paid and unpaid work that mothers and fathers do, fathers spend 54.2 hours per week working&#8211;paid and unpaid work&#8211;mothers spend 52.7. So they&#8217;re both about the same. All mothers and fathers have had a tough time in the last decade or two because the economy has been changing, more women have been working, they&#8217;ve been working more hours, and those kinds of changes put stresses on everybody involved. But fathers are contributing more to their children than they often get credit for.</p></div> <div class="question"><p><em class="name">Eleanor Barkhorn:</em> The book also describes what happens when a father isn&#8217;t around.</p></div> <div class="answer"> <p><em class="name"> Paul Raeburn:</em> The extent of the problem is larger than I would have expected. It turns out that depending on what study you look at &#8211; these things are not terribly precise &#8211; something like a third to a half of divorced fathers never or almost never see their children. That&#8217;s shocking to me. But I also have to say, having been divorced myself, there were times when my relationships with my children were very tenuous. Fortunately we didn&#8217;t quite fall into that scenario, but I can sort of see how it happens. It&#8217;s very sad that it happens so frequently.</p> <p>There&#8217;s a series of studies that show children are more likely to be involved in delinquency and criminal behavior and do more poorly in school if their fathers aren&#8217;t present. There&#8217;s a conversation that says it&#8217;s because fathers aren&#8217;t present, and others say that it&#8217;s more related to the poverty that is often faced by families when fathers aren&#8217;t present.</p> <p>But here&#8217;s a newer piece of research I found that&#8217;s quite interesting but again shows how intense the bonds can be between fathers and children. And it turns out that when the father is absent, or almost always absent, daughters go into puberty about a year earlier on average than they would have otherwise. The question is, what&#8217;s going on here? And the thinking is that when daughters grow up in a secure family, they&#8217;re protected, their basic needs are supplied, and everything is fine. Then there&#8217;s no great rush for them to mature and go out and think about forming their own families. When the father is absent &#8212; the daughter is not aware of this of course &#8212; something is triggering their hormonal systems to begin puberty early because their hormonal systems are getting a signal from their environment that their family situation is not secure, and that they might do better to seek out their own families where they might have a more secure situation. So not only do they go into puberty sooner &#8212; they&#8217;re more likely to engage in risky sexual behavior, more likely to get pregnant, more likely to get sexually transmitted diseases. So again it&#8217;s a profound connection between fathers and daughters in this case that until recently nobody knew existed.</p> </div> <div class="question"><p><em class="name">Eleanor Barkhorn:</em> It&#8217;s hard to read these studies without getting really upset, considering how many children grow up without their fathers actively involved in their lives. Can single mothers, or children who are growing up with absent fathers, read this book and not feel despair?</p></div> <div class="answer"> <p><em class="name"> Paul Raeburn:</em> The point here is that fathers are important for children but not essential.</p> <p>One single-mother friend of mine, her question was, &#8220;What should I do?&#8221; In other words, &#8220;What do I need to know that might be missing here that I could compensate for?&#8221; And that&#8217;s the kind of reaction that I hope people will have. Some researchers have suggested for example that single mothers try to involve a male father figure with their children. It may be a brother or uncle or you know somebody in the family. It could be a male figure that spends a lot of time with the kids &#8211; it could be a close friend. That&#8217;s not always possible. But it&#8217;s one good piece of advice for single mothers.</p> <p>Another example relates to language development: some researchers at North Carolina looked at fathers and mothers and the language ability of three- and four-year-olds. And they discovered a strong correlation between fathers&#8217; involvement with children and the children&#8217;s language abilities. Interestingly they found no correlation between mothers&#8217; involvement and children&#8217;s language abilities. So what they think is going on there is that families where mothers spend more time with their kids, they&#8217;re much more attuned to the kids&#8217; language, so they don&#8217;t use words that the kids don&#8217;t know, as often. Fathers, who might spend less time, are more likely to use many more words, and that stretches kids and puts them along. That doesn&#8217;t mean that in families where kids don&#8217;t have a father that kids won&#8217;t learn to talk. But it does suggest to single mothers that they might want to be a little more conscious of that and push their children a little more to encourage that kind of language development.</p> </div> <div class="question"><p><em class="name"> Eleanor Barkhorn:</em> What do you want parents to take from this book?</p></div> <div class="answer"><p><em class="name"> Paul Raeburn: </em>I hope the book will start a conversation, and that we&#8217;ll recognize that there are differences in the way mothers and fathers parent, and that&#8217;s a good thing. We can use that to raise happy and healthy children. We shouldn&#8217;t try to fight it. The facts are what the facts are. It&#8217;s actually a pretty good biological system.</p></div> <div class="question"><p><em class="name">Eleanor Barkhorn:</em> And what are the broader policy implications of your book? What can we do as a society to encourage more fathers to be part of their kids&#8217; lives?</p></div> <div class="answer"><p><em class="name">Paul Raeburn:</em> I didn&#8217;t do a lot of policy things. I tried to put the information about the importance of dads out there so that people could take that where they wanted to take it. But clearly there are three countries in the world that do not require parental leave, and the US is one of them. So parental leave and specifically paternal leave is something we need to make a policy priority here. This is the kind of thing that can not only help children with a lot of the psychological and social factors we talked about, but it has the potential to help reduce violence in urban communities, to improve behavior at school &#8211; a whole series of things that happen when fathers become engaged. The evidence shows that if fathers are engaged in the early years, they&#8217;ll continue to be more involved later on. Parental leave starts things off on the right foot, and it&#8217;s crazy that we don&#8217;t do that.</p></div> <hr> </div> </div>
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					</entry>
			<entry>
			
			<author>
				<name>Eleanor Barkhorn</name>
			</author>
			
			<title type="html"><![CDATA[In defense of running marathons]]></title>
			<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="https://www.vox.com/2016/6/1/11828858/marathons-are-great" />
			<id>https://www.vox.com/2016/6/1/11828858/marathons-are-great</id>
			<updated>2016-06-01T12:49:27-04:00</updated>
			<published>2016-06-01T13:30:03-04:00</published>
			<category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Science" />
							<summary type="html"><![CDATA[&#8220;Have we devised any greater waste of time and energy than the running of the marathon?&#8221; Slate asks today. Daniel Engber argues that the half-million Americans who run marathons every year would be better served doing something else: studying Arabic, for example, or volunteering at a soup kitchen. At the end of the piece, he [&#8230;]]]></summary>
			
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<img alt="" data-caption="That&#039;s me on the left, running the Boston Marathon in 2010. Look how happy I am! | Eleanor Barkhorn" data-portal-copyright="Eleanor Barkhorn" data-has-syndication-rights="1" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/6577199/26115_585442815752_1716128_n.jpg?quality=90&#038;strip=all&#038;crop=0,0,100,100" />
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	That's me on the left, running the Boston Marathon in 2010. Look how happy I am! | Eleanor Barkhorn	</figcaption>
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<p>&#8220;Have we devised any greater waste of time and energy than the running of the marathon?&#8221; Slate <a href="http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/the_antimarathon/2016/05/running_a_marathon_is_a_dangerous_expensive_stupid_meaningless_task_don.html">asks today</a>. Daniel Engber argues that the half-million Americans who run marathons every year would be better served doing something else: studying Arabic, for example, or volunteering at a soup kitchen. At the end of the piece, he urges readers to join his <a href="http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/the_antimarathon/2016/05/join_the_slate_anti_marathon_to_commit_to_a_skill_you_ve_been_wanting_to.html">anti-marathon movement</a> and commit to doing &#8220;something &mdash; anything!&#8221; other than training for and running a 26.2-mile race.</p>

<p>Though he protests otherwise, Engber&#8217;s essay is a clear example of rage trolling, and it rests on a puzzling premise: that marathon running is a uniquely unworthy goal, and that training for one, as compared with any other hobby, is an especially useless endeavor.</p>
<p><q class="center" aria-hidden="true"><span>Marathons have helped me stay in shape, given my life structure, and made me feel good at something</span></q></p>
<p>He&#8217;s wrong. I&rsquo;ve trained for and run in three marathons, and none of them was a waste of time. Marathons have given me structure, friendship, a sense of accomplishment, and, most importantly, pure joy.</p>

<p>My first marathon was the New Jersey Marathon. I started training midway through my sophomore year of college as a sort of quest for redemption after a series of ego-bruising events.</p>

<p>Two years earlier, I&rsquo;d been at the top of my high school class and an enthusiastic if middling member of several sports teams. But college delivered one blow after another:<strong> </strong>I was cut from the crew team and bounced from the social club I&rsquo;d tried to join. My grades were, for the first time in my life, mediocre. I dated a guy who was not very nice to me for six months.</p>

<p>Training for a marathon offered a chance to be good at something again, to set a goal and achieve it. I got a training buddy, and we went on long runs together and talked about books and life and friends. Our only goal was to finish, but we<strong> </strong>ended up finishing in under four hours &mdash; far faster than we&#8217;d expected. Not bad for some teenage crew team rejects.</p>

<p>My second marathon was the New York City Marathon, which I trained for while I was living in Leland, Mississippi, and working as a reporter at the local paper. I did my long runs with a group of 30-something men who were training for the Memphis Marathon. They got a kick out of me, this chipper, chatty New Yorker in their midst. And I loved getting to know some white Southern men &mdash; a group I&rsquo;d spent most of my life unkindly stereotyping. (And wouldn&#8217;t you know it, several years later I ended up marrying a white Southern man, though not one of my Mississippi marathon friends.)</p>

<p>My New York City Marathon race day experience points to another thing Engber&#8217;s piece gets wrong about actually running in a race. He compares marathon running to mountain climbing: &#8220;At least Everest has a view!&#8221; But he has obviously never run across the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge or the 59th Street Bridge on a glorious November day. The opportunity to run all over my home city, cheered on by friends and strangers and high school band members, is one I&rsquo;ll cherish forever.</p>
<p><q class="center" aria-hidden="true"><span>I told a friend right after the Boston Marathon that it felt like &#8220;getting a kiss on the forehead from God.&#8221; (The runner&#8217;s high is real, my friends.)</span></q></p>
<p>My third and final marathon was Boston. After my surprisingly good showing at the New Jersey Marathon, I&rsquo;d made qualifying for Boston a goal, and my time in the New York City Marathon just barely got me in.</p>

<p>By the time I was training for Boston, I was living in Washington, DC, working as an editor at a magazine. It was the first marathon I trained for alone, but that was what I needed at the time: I was living with roommates, and I relished the solo, contemplative time that running gave me. The training was also a much-needed extracurricular activity for me &mdash; my job was exciting and demanding, and if I hadn&rsquo;t had running it would have been tempting to let work take over my life.</p>

<p>Race day was exhilarating; I told a friend right afterward that it felt like &#8220;getting a kiss on the forehead from God.&#8221; (The runner&#8217;s high is real, my friends.) The people of Boston love marathon day, and they were out in droves. Wellesley College students scream so loudly in support of the runners that you can hear them a mile away. The energy was so great that when I reached the course&#8217;s infamous Heartbreak Hill 20 miles in, I actually picked up my pace.</p>

<p>After running a personal record time in Boston six years ago, I &#8220;retired&#8221; from marathons. The Slate article rightly points out that running does inflict wear and tear on the body, and I want to be active well into old age. Like a lot of ex-marathoners,<strong> </strong>I didn&rsquo;t want my 80-year-old self to be hobbling around on prosthetic knees because of my youthful running.</p>

<p>But I&rsquo;ve continued to pursue goal-oriented fitness endeavors: I did a long-distance relay race called a Ragnar a few years ago; I&rsquo;ve run a half-marathon; my current obsession is Flywheel, a spinning class where you get a score that allows you to compete with others and yourself. (This is another form of exercise that Slate <a href="http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2013/04/flywheel_exercise_craze_soulcycle_for_uber_competitive_sadists.html">thinks is worthless</a>, by the way.)</p>

<p>It&#8217;s difficult to comprehend why any of this could be considered a waste of time, and I cannot imagine my life without it. Marathons have helped me stay in shape, given my life structure, and made me feel good at something in seasons where my job or school or relationships weren&rsquo;t going well. Oh, yeah &mdash; and they&#8217;re fun. That alone is more than enough to make them worth my time.</p>
<hr class="wp-block-separator" /><h2 class="wp-block-heading">Watch: Why do people run the marathon? I ran one to find out.</h2><!-- CHORUS_VIDEO_EMBED ChorusVideo:64550 -->
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					</entry>
			<entry>
			
			<author>
				<name>Eleanor Barkhorn</name>
			</author>
			
			<title type="html"><![CDATA[7 expenses I didn&#8217;t budget for as a new parent]]></title>
			<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="https://www.vox.com/2016/5/11/11650926/parenting-costs-unexpected" />
			<id>https://www.vox.com/2016/5/11/11650926/parenting-costs-unexpected</id>
			<updated>2016-05-11T10:44:06-04:00</updated>
			<published>2016-05-11T12:30:03-04:00</published>
			<category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Life" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Money" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Parenting" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Personal Finance" />
							<summary type="html"><![CDATA[My husband and I knew we&#8217;d be spending more money after our daughter was born. On top of all the stuff we&#8217;d acquired to prepare for her arrival (car seat, crib, bed linens, clothes, changing table, stroller), we knew we&#8217;d be taking on day care payments, higher health insurance premiums, regular shipments of diapers and [&#8230;]]]></summary>
			
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<img alt="" data-caption="The baby swaddle: much harder than it looks! | &lt;a href=&quot;http://www.shutterstock.com/&quot;&gt;Shutterstock&lt;/a&gt;" data-portal-copyright="&lt;a href=&quot;http://www.shutterstock.com/&quot;&gt;Shutterstock&lt;/a&gt;" data-has-syndication-rights="1" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/15806896/shutterstock_8431645.0.0.1499986276.jpg?quality=90&#038;strip=all&#038;crop=0,0,100,100" />
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	The baby swaddle: much harder than it looks! | <a href="http://www.shutterstock.com/">Shutterstock</a>	</figcaption>
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<p>My husband and I knew we&#8217;d be spending more money after our daughter was born. On top of all the stuff we&#8217;d acquired to prepare for her arrival (car seat, crib, bed linens, clothes, changing table, stroller), we knew we&#8217;d be taking on day care payments, higher health insurance premiums, regular shipments of diapers and wipes, and any number of other costs associated with keeping a baby alive and happy.</p>

<p>But we didn&#8217;t think of everything. Starting just hours after her birth we were confronted with costs we didn&#8217;t anticipate. That added unnecessary stress to the first hours and weeks of her life: Nothing punctures the euphoric baby bubble like an unexpected hospital bill. Altogether, we ended up spending about $1,500 more than we expected in the month after our daughter&#8217;s birth. Here&#8217;s how it broke down.</p>

<p>Some of the costs are ones we probably should have anticipated; others we really couldn&#8217;t have seen coming. But the point is, when you have a baby for the first time, you&#8217;re going to be surprised by the things you spend money on, no matter how prepared you think you are.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">1) The cost of our daughter&#039;s stay at the hospital in the days after she was born (about $200 out of pocket)</h2>
<p>This was a complete brain lapse on my part. I knew I would pay some out-of-pocket cost for my labor and delivery, and for my recovery time in the hospital after my daughter was born (though as my colleague Johnny Harris documents in a wonderful video, I had <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/5/5/11591592/birth-cost-hospital-bills">no idea exactly</a> how much it would be). And I knew I would need to get my daughter added to a health insurance plan soon after she was born, for the multiple trips to the pediatrician that newborns make.</p>

<p>But for some reason I didn&#8217;t consider the cost of her stay at the hospital for the two nights after her birth. (She had an uncomplicated vaginal delivery; if she&#8217;d been born via C-section, we&#8217;d have stayed in the hospital for a night or two more. And a birth with complications could have led to a longer stay as well.)</p>

<p>After a bit of back and forth with the insurance company, our out-of-pocket cost for her time in the hospital ended up being around $200. Depending on the terms of your insurance, you could end up paying more or less.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">2) Upcharge for a private room at the hospital ($300 a night)</h2>
<p>At the hospital where I delivered, the standard maternity room is double occupancy. So after hours of exhausting labor, you get wheeled into a room that you share with another woman and her baby. While not the end of the world, this is obviously not ideal &#8230; and &mdash; oh, how convenient! &mdash; the hospital offers another option: a private room for $300 a night. (For comparison&#8217;s sake, that&#8217;s how much a night at the lovely Sofitel in downtown Washington, DC, costs.)</p>

<p>I&#8217;d labored all night, so when the nurse asked if we wanted the costly private room option, my sleep-deprived brain couldn&#8217;t say yes fast enough. Not all hospitals operate the way this one did &mdash; there are plenty of places where a private maternity room is standard. But it&#8217;s worth checking in advance what the policy is at the hospital where you&#8217;re delivering, and if there are any other hidden add-ons that you should anticipate.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">3) Three swaddle sacks ($30 each)</h2>
<p>Swaddling is the go-to way for newborns to sleep these days: It involves wrapping a baby in a blanket so his arms stay put. My husband and I took a baby care class a few weeks before our daughter was born, where we practiced swaddling on plastic baby dolls. It was tricky, but we got the hang of it by the end of the class. We ordered several sets of trendy Aden and Anais swaddle blankets and envisioned our baby spending her first weeks on Earth snuggled up in hand-wrapped swaddles.</p>

<p>Then the baby was born, and we quickly learned that real babies are a lot squirmier than plastic baby dolls. The nurses at the hospital made swaddling look easy, but when we tried it ourselves we found it impossible.</p>

<p>There was one particularly farcical moment in the hospital when the baby was crying and my parents, my husband, and I each took turns trying to swaddle her, consulting three different, contradicting sets of instructions we found online. It was like the setup for a bad lightbulb joke &mdash; how many college-educated adults does it take to swaddle a baby? Finally we gave up and paged the nurse, who came in and did the swaddle with one hand behind her back.</p>

<p>I immediately went to Amazon and ordered <a href="http://www.halosleep.com/sleepsack-swaddle/">three swaddle sacks</a>, express delivery so they would arrive by the time we got home from the hospital. These sacks use Velcro and cloth to keep the baby&#8217;s arms down, and they&#8217;re basically fail-safe. We never even attempted a blanket swaddle again.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">4) Home visit from a lactation consultant ($280)</h2>
<p>Breastfeeding, like swaddling, is something that can seem simple enough under controlled circumstances but when you&#8217;re left to your own devices becomes quite difficult. While I was at the hospital, I was visited several times by in-house lactation consultants, who helped me prop the baby on the pillows just right and adjust the hospital bed to the perfect angle so the baby easily latched onto me.</p>

<p>As soon as I got home, far from the mechanical hospital bed and the endless supply of pillows, trouble began. The baby kept insisting on a &#8220;shallow latch&#8221; &mdash; which was extraordinarily painful. I&#8217;d wince every time she started eating, and eventually I started to dread feeding her. Not exactly the blissful mother-daughter bonding experience I&#8217;d hoped breastfeeding to be.</p>

<p>Fortunately I live in a city where there are lots of resources for breastfeeding moms, and I was able to book a home visit from a lactation consultant on less than 24 hours&#8217; notice. After an hour with her, I was much better at getting my daughter to latch properly, and I didn&#8217;t experience any further problems with pain and breastfeeding. I was thrilled. I was also $280 poorer.</p>

<p>Still, I was lucky that I was able to resolve my breastfeeding problems quickly. This doesn&#8217;t happen for everyone &mdash; there are countless mothers who fully intend to breastfeed but then run into problems and just can&#8217;t. Those women face will unexpected costs, too: around <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/4/27/11509974/breastfeeding-cost">$100 per month on formula</a>, plus bottles, nipples, and other supplies.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">5) New, nursing-friendly clothes ($200) plus a new, postpartum body–friendly party dress ($200)</h2>
<p>I knew I would need nursing bras ($25 to $50 each) to help make breastfeeding easier, but it didn&#8217;t occur to me until I got home from the hospital how few of my clothes were amenable to nursing in public. Shirts with a crewneck or boatneck were out, because they required me to lift up my shirt and expose my stomach while nursing; same with many dresses, as lifting them up meant even more body exposure.</p>

<p>I ended up buying a few deep V-neck dresses and tops, plus some button-down shirts. Depending on the contents of your closet, you may end up needing to do the same.</p>

<p>Clothing can be an issue even if you aren&#8217;t breastfeeding. It can take several months to lose the weight you gained during pregnancy, so you may need to buy a few transitional outfits, especially if your maternity clothes are worn out or are not appropriate for the season you&#8217;re in or a particular event you&#8217;re going to. I ran into a problem when deciding what to wear to a wedding two months after I gave birth. None of my formal dresses fit, and I couldn&#8217;t think of anyone to borrow a dress from, so I bought a new one.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">6) Baby box ($75)</h2>
<p>Like many parents, our pre-baby &#8220;nesting&#8221; included lovingly setting up the baby&#8217;s cradle in our room so she&#8217;d be close by for night feedings. That worked great at night. But newborns sleep a lot during the day as well, and I soon realized that unless I wanted to be stuck in my bedroom all day, I&#8217;d need a portable place for her to sleep so I could hang out in the living room or kitchen and still have her close by.</p>

<p>We decided to buy a <a href="http://www.babyboxco.com/collections/baby-boxes">Finnish-style baby box</a>, which is pretty much what it sounds like: a lightweight, medium-size cardboard box with a mattress nestled in the bottom of it. It worked great as a place for the baby to sleep during the day for the first few months of her life, and now that she&#8217;s too big for it, we use it as a box to store the clothes she&#8217;s outgrown.</p>

<p>Another purchase that can help make daytime baby care simpler: Families who live in homes with two floors might also consider getting a second changing table so they don&#8217;t need to run up and down the stairs every time the baby needs a new diaper. (If you don&#8217;t want to spend the money on a second changing table, a less expensive, more portable option is the <a href="http://www.keekaroo.com/peanutdiaperchanger.html">Keekaroo Peanut changing pad</a>.)</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">7) Stuff that makes your life easier/more fun (truly limitless)</h2>
<p>An Amazon Prime membership so you can get your next shipment of diapers ASAP. Nightly takeout food because you&#8217;re too tired to cook. A regular housecleaning service because one baby creates about five times more mess than two adults. A Netflix subscription for entertainment during middle-of-the-night feedings. Uber Family rides because you can&#8217;t bear the idea of taking a crying baby on public transportation. A few more bottles of wine per month than usual to help take the edge off. The work of parenting can push you to add items to your budget that you&#8217;d never considered before, in the name of making your life less stressful.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Giving birth costs a lot of money. Hospitals won&#039;t tell you how much.</h2><div class="video-container"><iframe src="https://volume.vox-cdn.com/embed/a02b90328?player_type=youtube&#038;loop=1&#038;placement=article&#038;tracking=article:rss" allowfullscreen frameborder="0" allow=""></iframe></div>
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									</content>
			
					</entry>
			<entry>
			
			<author>
				<name>Eleanor Barkhorn</name>
			</author>
			
			<title type="html"><![CDATA[Happy Mother&#8217;s Day: 7 essays on the joys and challenges of motherhood]]></title>
			<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="https://www.vox.com/2016/5/8/11590128/mothers-day-motherhood-essays" />
			<id>https://www.vox.com/2016/5/8/11590128/mothers-day-motherhood-essays</id>
			<updated>2018-09-14T17:38:53-04:00</updated>
			<published>2016-05-08T06:00:03-04:00</published>
			<category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="archives" />
							<summary type="html"><![CDATA[The mother-child relationship is unlike any other. Our views about ourselves and the world around us are uniquely shaped by our mothers. And then when women become mothers themselves, they find their lives changed by their children. These essays explore the joys and challenges of being a mother &#8212; and having a mother. 1 &#59401; [&#8230;]]]></summary>
			
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<img alt="" data-caption="" data-portal-copyright="&lt;a href=&quot;http://www.shutterstock.com/&quot;&gt;Shutterstock&lt;/a&gt;" data-has-syndication-rights="1" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/13084595/shutterstock_8344504.0.0.1536463895.jpg?quality=90&#038;strip=all&#038;crop=0,0,100,100" />
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<div class="chorus-snippet center"><p>The mother-child relationship is unlike any other. Our views about ourselves and the world around us are uniquely shaped by our mothers. And then when women become mothers themselves, they find their lives changed by their children. These essays explore the joys and challenges of being a mother &mdash; and having a mother.</p></div><!-- BEGIN LISTICLE SNIPPET --><div id="1462368296_979" class="m-listicle js-social-item full-width-image numbered"> <div class="m-listicle__header"> <span class="m-listicle__number">1</span><div class="m-listicle__social"> <a href="#1462368296_979">&#59401;</a> <a class="js-button-social facebook" href="https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?" data-analytics-social="facebook">&#59394;</a> <a class="js-button-social twitter" href="https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?" data-analytics-social="twitter">&#59395;</a> </div> </div> <h3 class="js-social-title"> <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/4/13/11386768/mother-daughter-model">&#8220;My mom was a world-famous model. It took me decades to finally feel beautiful.&#8221;</a> by Anna Murray</h3> <div class="m-listicle__image full-width-image"><img data-chorus-asset-id="6435897" alt="AnnaMurray.177.0.0.0.jpg" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/6435897/AnnaMurray.177.0.0.0.jpg"></div> <div class="m-listicle__content"> <p>I learned from Mom&#8217;s clear-eyed assessment of me that I have long legs but a short waist. I have a classically beautiful face but will never pull off clothes like my broad-shouldered sister. On my small frame (&#8220;from your father&#8217;s side&#8221;), five extra pounds will &#8220;show like nobody&#8217;s business.&#8221;</p> <p>Mom didn&#8217;t mean any of it as criticism. She meant it as fact. Her lesson: Know what you have and make the most of it. Hurt feelings only get in the way. The best thing you can do is to acknowledge the truth of your body and deal with it. Beauty for Mom was almost disembodied, like a vase or a piece of furniture &mdash; an object to be positioned for best advantage.</p> <p><a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/4/13/11386768/mother-daughter-model">READ THE STORY</a></p> </div> </div><!-- END LISTICLE SNIPPET --><!-- BEGIN LISTICLE SNIPPET --><div id="1462368296_979" class="m-listicle js-social-item full-width-image numbered"> <div class="m-listicle__header"> <span class="m-listicle__number">2</span><div class="m-listicle__social"> <a href="#1462368296_979">&#59401;</a> <a class="js-button-social facebook" href="https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?" data-analytics-social="facebook">&#59394;</a> <a class="js-button-social twitter" href="https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?" data-analytics-social="twitter">&#59395;</a> </div> </div> <h3 class="js-social-title"> <a href="http://www.vox.com/2014/5/9/5683724/why-mothers-and-daughters-fight">&#8220;Why daughters fight with their mothers&#8221;</a> by Eleanor Barkhorn</h3> <div class="m-listicle__image full-width-image"><img data-chorus-asset-id="639340" alt="Mother and Daughter 2" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/assets/4425989/mother_daughter_2.jpg"></div> <div class="m-listicle__content"> <p>These conflicting desires &mdash; the mother&#8217;s desire to protect versus the daughter&#8217;s desire for approval &mdash; set the stage for painful misunderstandings and arguments. The well-meaning mother gives advice; the approval-seeking daughter takes offense and tells her mother to leave her alone; the mother throws up her hands and says she feels like she can&#8217;t say anything that won&#8217;t upset her daughter.</p> <p><a href="http://www.vox.com/2014/5/9/5683724/why-mothers-and-daughters-fight">READ THE STORY</a></p> </div> </div><!-- END LISTICLE SNIPPET --><!-- BEGIN LISTICLE SNIPPET --><div id="1462368296_979" class="m-listicle js-social-item full-width-image numbered"> <div class="m-listicle__header"> <span class="m-listicle__number">3</span><div class="m-listicle__social"> <a href="#1462368296_979">&#59401;</a> <a class="js-button-social facebook" href="https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?" data-analytics-social="facebook">&#59394;</a> <a class="js-button-social twitter" href="https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?" data-analytics-social="twitter">&#59395;</a> </div> </div> <h3 class="js-social-title"> <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/4/20/11459316/felon-heroin-addict-mother">&#8220;What it&#8217;s like to be a mom when Google knows you&#8217;re a felon&#8221;</a> by Morgan Gliedman</h3> <div class="m-listicle__image full-width-image"><img data-chorus-asset-id="6435989" alt="shutterstock_206090086.0.png" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/6435989/shutterstock_206090086.0.png"></div> <div class="m-listicle__content"> <p>I&#8217;m a mom in Manhattan. I&#8217;m also a felon and former addict, with a horrific Google trail and a raging rap sheet. Making mom friends can be awkward for any new parent, but for me, typical playground small talk &mdash; &#8220;what does your husband do,&#8221; &#8220;did you have an easy pregnancy,&#8221; &#8220;what was your life like before you had kids&#8221; &mdash; is like navigating quicksand, constantly trying to balance my desire to be transparent about my life with my dread of people judging my child for my past.</p> <p>I am not alone: <a href="http://www.drugfree.org/new-data-show-millions-of-americans-with-alcohol-and-drug-addiction-could-benefit-from-health-care-r/">23.5 million Americans</a> are addicted to alcohol and drugs, and there are an estimated <a href="http://mobile.reuters.com/article/idUSBRE89N1C620121024">20 million felons</a> in the United States.</p> <p><a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/4/20/11459316/felon-heroin-addict-mother">READ THE STORY</a></p> </div> </div><!-- END LISTICLE SNIPPET --><!-- BEGIN LISTICLE SNIPPET --><div id="1462368296_979" class="m-listicle js-social-item full-width-image numbered"> <div class="m-listicle__header"> <span class="m-listicle__number">4</span><div class="m-listicle__social"> <a href="#1462368296_979">&#59401;</a> <a class="js-button-social facebook" href="https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?" data-analytics-social="facebook">&#59394;</a> <a class="js-button-social twitter" href="https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?" data-analytics-social="twitter">&#59395;</a> </div> </div> <h3 class="js-social-title"> <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/3/3/11140592/mean-girl-daughter-bully">&#8220;Bullies ruined my childhood. Then I realized my daughter is one.&#8221;</a> by Kate Young</h3> <div class="m-listicle__image full-width-image"><img data-chorus-asset-id="6436005" alt="6386842401_499330faa4_o.0.jpg" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/6436005/6386842401_499330faa4_o.0.jpg"></div> <div class="m-listicle__content"> <p>I knew that when I became a parent, I did not want my children to experience the pain of what I had gone through. I wanted them to have confidence in themselves and their unique abilities while still being compassionate and empathetic to others. I felt my mission as a parent was to ensure I had well-adjusted children. I based my personal worth in that goal.</p> <p>In my attempt to shield Emily from anything that could hurt her emotionally, I harmed her. My &#8220;hands on&#8221; parenting did her a disservice by giving her mixed messages. On one hand, I was telling her to be kind to others and to be inclusive. On the flip side, I was telling her she was the most important person in the world.</p> <p><a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/3/3/11140592/mean-girl-daughter-bully">READ THE STORY</a></p> </div> </div><!-- END LISTICLE SNIPPET --><!-- BEGIN LISTICLE SNIPPET --><div id="1462368296_979" class="m-listicle js-social-item full-width-image numbered"> <div class="m-listicle__header"> <span class="m-listicle__number">5</span><div class="m-listicle__social"> <a href="#1462368296_979">&#59401;</a> <a class="js-button-social facebook" href="https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?" data-analytics-social="facebook">&#59394;</a> <a class="js-button-social twitter" href="https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?" data-analytics-social="twitter">&#59395;</a> </div> </div> <h3 class="js-social-title"> <a href="http://www.vox.com/2015/5/8/8556845/LGBT-families-stigma">&#8220;How homophobia turned me against my gay mother&#8221;</a> by Joshua Gunn</h3> <div class="m-listicle__image full-width-image"><img data-chorus-asset-id="6436023" alt="shutterstock_274910543.0.0__1_.0.jpg" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/6436023/shutterstock_274910543.0.0__1_.0.jpg"></div> <div class="m-listicle__content"> <p>I&#8217;m still ashamed of how I treated my mom after she came out. I&#8217;d grown up in a community suffused with homophobia &mdash; neighbors and family members alike tossed around works like &#8220;dyke&#8221; and &#8220;faggot&#8221; all the time. At first, that atmosphere turned me against my mother. It made me so angry at her I could barely speak. As I grew older, thankfully, that anger dissolved into love and acceptance of her and our unusual family.</p> <p>But even after I made peace with my family, I still had to face the world around me, a world that was still at war with families like mine. Bigotry and stigma were constant shadows throughout my childhood. As a result, I felt a persistent, nagging pressure to uphold an image of perfection for myself and my family. Every argument between my parents, every bad choice I made, every lousy report card I took home, felt like a referendum on the way I was being raised.</p> <p><a href="http://www.vox.com/2015/5/8/8556845/LGBT-families-stigma">READ THE STORY</a></p> </div> </div><!-- END LISTICLE SNIPPET --><!-- BEGIN LISTICLE SNIPPET --><div id="1462368296_979" class="m-listicle js-social-item full-width-image numbered"> <div class="m-listicle__header"> <span class="m-listicle__number">6</span><div class="m-listicle__social"> <a href="#1462368296_979">&#59401;</a> <a class="js-button-social facebook" href="https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?" data-analytics-social="facebook">&#59394;</a> <a class="js-button-social twitter" href="https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?" data-analytics-social="twitter">&#59395;</a> </div> </div> <h3 class="js-social-title"> <a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/4/26/11502530/man-without-children">&#8220;Why I&rsquo;m too selfish to have children&#8221;</a> by Sung J. Woo</h3> <div class="m-listicle__image full-width-image"><img data-chorus-asset-id="6436047" alt="dad_no_kids_cover_photo.0.0.0.jpg" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/6436047/dad_no_kids_cover_photo.0.0.0.jpg"></div> <div class="m-listicle__content"> <p>So what, then, for this eerie childlessness in the Woo clan? Why is it that three well-adjusted children who grew up to have steady partners and steady jobs and steady residences all decided against reproduction?</p> <p>Not that I want to be a clich&eacute; or anything, but I believe the answer lies within my mother.</p> <p>My father left for the United States when I was a toddler and we weren&#8217;t reunited until I turned 10. During the formative years of my life, my mother was all that I had. But as a child, I never quite felt my father&#8217;s absence because my mother deluged me with love. I could do no wrong in her eyes, even if I did do wrong.</p> <p><a href="http://www.vox.com/2016/4/26/11502530/man-without-children">READ THE STORY</a></p> </div> </div><!-- END LISTICLE SNIPPET --><!-- BEGIN LISTICLE SNIPPET --><div id="1462368296_979" class="m-listicle js-social-item full-width-image numbered"> <div class="m-listicle__header"> <span class="m-listicle__number">7</span><div class="m-listicle__social"> <a href="#1462368296_979">&#59401;</a> <a class="js-button-social facebook" href="https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?" data-analytics-social="facebook">&#59394;</a> <a class="js-button-social twitter" href="https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?" data-analytics-social="twitter">&#59395;</a> </div> </div> <h3 class="js-social-title"> <a href="http://www.vox.com/2015/2/12/8006733/stay-at-home-mom">&#8220;9 things I wish I&#8217;d known before I became a stay-at-home mom&#8221;</a> by Lisa Endlich Heffernan</h3> <div class="m-listicle__image full-width-image"><img data-chorus-asset-id="6436093" alt="shutterstock_226437031.0.0__4_.0.jpg" src="https://platform.vox.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/chorus/uploads/chorus_asset/file/6436093/shutterstock_226437031.0.0__4_.0.jpg"></div> <div class="m-listicle__content"> <p>The one job I never imagined having is the one that I&#8217;ve held for the longest. When I had two very small children and was planning a third, I quit my job at the London office of an American bank and became a stay-at-home mom. Although I wrote while I was home with my sons, I spent most of my time taking care of them. This decision ran counter to everything I was raised to believe in the 1970s and &#8217;80s and everything I had done to prepare myself for adulthood.</p> <p>In my world, if you went to school alongside the boys, and then worked alongside the men, you didn&#8217;t give it all up because parenting small children while working full time turns out to be really tough. But give it up I did.</p> <p><a href="http://www.vox.com/2015/2/12/8006733/stay-at-home-mom">READ THE STORY</a></p> </div> </div><!-- END LISTICLE SNIPPET --><hr class="wp-block-separator" /><div class="chorus-snippet center"><!-- CHORUS_VIDEO_EMBED ChorusVideo:70634 --></div>
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			<author>
				<name>Eleanor Barkhorn</name>
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			<title type="html"><![CDATA[There are lots of great reasons to breast-feed. Saving money isn’t one of them.]]></title>
			<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="https://www.vox.com/2016/4/27/11509974/breastfeeding-cost" />
			<id>https://www.vox.com/2016/4/27/11509974/breastfeeding-cost</id>
			<updated>2016-04-27T11:18:08-04:00</updated>
			<published>2016-04-27T14:30:02-04:00</published>
			<category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Money" /><category scheme="https://www.vox.com" term="Personal Finance" />
							<summary type="html"><![CDATA[In the perpetual debate over breast-feeding, breast-feeding advocates make one point over and over: Breast-feeding costs a lot less than formula. Considering how much money new parents find themselves spending &#8212; baby furniture and clothes! medical bills! a higher rent or mortgage payment so baby can have her own room! &#8212; the idea of an [&#8230;]]]></summary>
			
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<p>In the perpetual debate over breast-feeding, breast-feeding advocates make one point over and over: Breast-feeding <a href="http://kellymom.com/pregnancy/bf-prep/bfcostbenefits/">costs a lot less</a> than formula. Considering how much money new parents find themselves spending &mdash; baby furniture and clothes! medical bills! a higher rent or mortgage payment so baby can have her own room! &mdash; the idea of an <a href="http://www.babycentre.co.uk/x536357/what-are-the-benefits-of-breastfeeding#ixzz46xK0YInr">almost-free food source</a> is very appealing.</p>

<p>In a narrow sense, it&#8217;s true that breast-feeding is inexpensive. But that&#8217;s only true if you assume your time has no value. Once you take into account the hundreds of hours the average breast-feeding mother spends nursing and pumping, breast-feeding doesn&#8217;t seem so affordable after all.</p>

<p>This doesn&#8217;t mean breast-feeding is a bad idea. I&#8217;m breast-feeding my eight-month-old daughter and I&#8217;ve found the experience very rewarding. But if you&#8217;re a new mother who doesn&#8217;t enjoy breastfeeding, it probably doesn&#8217;t make sense to do it just for the fairly modest cost savings.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Nursing costs money. Formula costs more.</h2>
<p>Even in monetary terms, breastfeeding isn&#8217;t totally free. Nursing moms need a few nursing bras (I splurged and bought three of the <a href="http://bravadodesigns.com/products/body-silk-seamless-nursing-bra">$50 Bravado Seamless</a>; <a href="http://www.target.com/p/basics-women-s-stella-maternity-nursing-bra/-/A-14579247#prodSlot=medium_1_1&amp;term=stella+maternity+bra?clkid=26582062N3607cd96cb6ff2fe348b8610&amp;lnm=81938&amp;afid=Skimbit+Ltd.&amp;ref=tgt_adv_xasd0002">Target sells</a> a similar-looking bra for $25) and may get other &#8220;accessories&#8221; of varying levels of usefulness (I used my $30 nursing pillow for about a half a day before relegating it to the closet, while the MammaBaby app I bought for $3.99 to track the baby&#8217;s feedings was tremendously valuable).</p>

<p>Also, the mother eats extra so her body can create enough milk to feed her baby, which adds to the grocery bill.</p>

<p>Those are just the basics. Mothers who have trouble breast-feeding at first, as I did, may get a private session with a lactation consultant. Ours cost $280 and wasn&#8217;t covered by insurance. (I could have attended a free class at my local breast-feeding center, but five days post-partum I had no desire to navigate DC traffic to get there.)</p>

<p>But these costs are low compared to formula. <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Similac-Advance-Infant-Formula-Powder/dp/B017RMGC3M?ie=UTF8&amp;refRID=W0H0AKGGQETDS6C2T830&amp;ref_=pd_ybh_a_71">A month&#8217;s supply of Similac</a>, one of the top-selling formula brands in the US, is around $110. If the baby has allergies or digestion issues and needs a special type of formula, costs can run up to $350 a month or beyond. Plus you have to buy bottles (<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Dr-Browns-Natural-Newborn-Packaging/dp/B001IXYOD2/ref=sr_1_2_s_it?s=baby-products&amp;ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1461694336&amp;sr=1-2&amp;keywords=baby+bottles">around $50</a> for enough that you&#8217;re not washing bottles constantly) and maybe a bottle warmer (<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Dr-Browns-850T-Bottle-Warmer/dp/B0035LLG2W/ref=sr_1_5_s_it?s=baby-products&amp;ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1461694487&amp;sr=1-5&amp;keywords=bottle+warmer">$30</a>) and bottle-cleaning brush (<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Dr-Browns-700-Bottle-Brush/dp/B000N0SNHY">$3 each</a>).</p>

<p>Add it all up, and a family can save more than $500 by following the <a href="http://www.who.int/nutrition/topics/exclusive_breastfeeding/en/">World Health Organization&#8217;s recommendation</a> to breast-feed a child for the first six months of his or her life. (Though a $280 lactation consultant visit cuts into those savings significantly.)</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Nursing takes less money but a lot more time for the mother</h2>
<p>In a broader sense, however, breast-feeding is quite costly. That&#8217;s because breast-feeding takes time, and time has value.</p>

<p>In the first month after my daughter was born, she spent up to four and a half hours per day eating. That time has decreased as she&#8217;s gotten older and more efficient, but even now she eats around two hours a day.</p>

<p>Because of the nature of breast-feeding, nursing mothers end up providing the majority of those feedings. In families that formula-feed, the father or non-nursing partner can give a few feedings per day, as can another member of the family, or a babysitter. This is not so in families that breast-feed: Nursing requires the mother to bear the time cost of feeding the baby. Those hours she spends breast-feeding the baby are hours she cannot spend doing something else, like paid work, or leisure, or household tasks.</p>

<p>(This is why, as this <a href="http://www.babble.com/pregnancy/new-study-breastfeeding-isnt-free/">Babble post</a> from a few years ago points out, even stay-at-home moms are affected by productivity losses associated with breast-feeding: &#8220;a baby who&rsquo;s having a growth spurt and nursing around the clock isn&rsquo;t gonna understand &mdash; or care &mdash; that mom was hoping to mop the floors and pay the bills that day.&#8221;)</p>

<p>The Affordable Care Act includes provisions that help to lessen the burden of breast-feeding on women. Health insurance is now required to cover the cost of a breast pump, and many employers must provide a room in which mothers can pump and store their milk &mdash; that way, a family member or paid caregiver can feed the baby pumped breast milk while the mother is at work. These accommodations help spread out the responsibility of feeding the baby, so it&#8217;s not all on the mother. But they are not cost-free, either.</p>

<p>For workers who are paid hourly &mdash; even at a low wage &mdash; these costs add up quickly. Suppose a new mother spends an hour per workday pumping and makes $15 per hour. That adds up to around $300 per month in lost wages, vastly more than the cost of formula, without even considering the extra time she spends nursing outside of work hours.</p>
<h2 class="wp-block-heading">Even for salaried moms like me, breast-feeding has real costs</h2>
<p>I was fortunate to have a fully paid 12-week maternity leave, so I was not missing out on wages by taking time to feed my daughter in her early months. And since I have a salary and am not paid by the hour, I don&#8217;t literally lose earnings for pumping milk now that I am back at the office. But there&#8217;s no question that pumping two or three times a day hampers my productivity at work.</p>

<p>These costs are not just theoretical. A <a href="http://asr.sagepub.com/content/77/2/244.abstract">2012 study</a> in the American Sociological Review by Phyllis L. F. Rippeyoung and Mary C. Noonan found that mothers who breast-feed for six months or longer experience more severe and more prolonged earnings losses than mothers who formula feed or breast-feed for shorter than six months. That&#8217;s because breast-feeding mothers are more likely to work part time or drop out of the workforce altogether.</p>

<p>&#8220;Breast-feeding is extremely time-consuming. Obviously, work is, too. It&#8217;s very hard to do both simultaneously,&#8221; Noonan, an associate professor at the University of Iowa, said.</p>

<p>Of course, we are not completely economics-driven beings. I&#8217;ve loved nursing my daughter in ways I&#8217;m almost embarrassed to write down because I know how corny I sound: I love feeling close to her. I love that the nourishment I was providing for her while she was in the womb is continuing now that she is outside of it.</p>

<p>On a more practical note, I love knowing that she is receiving some health benefits from nursing. I love how nursing made it relatively easy for me to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. I love how easy it is to travel with her, or even to just leave the house for several hours at a time with her &mdash; no need to mix bottles of formula and lug them around with me.</p>

<p>But all those benefits did not come free. Considering the time it takes to breast-feed a child, and the costs associated with that time, should be part of every woman&#8217;s calculations when she decides whether or not to breast-feed her baby.</p>
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